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You can’t make this stuff up…I mean, you can try, but why bother when Hamas does it for you?

We’ve heard about the Zionist sharks, wolves, squirrels, ravens…and now we have…dolphins.

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It all started with several Israeli news sites covering a report that Hamas has claimed to have captured an Israeli spy…a dolphin equipped with camera and other “espionage equipment”.

It’s really hot and they are really stupid. Put that together and you have a day of jokes led primarily by the infinitely funny Benji Lovitt (www.benjilovitt.com).
Here’s a sampling of how Israelis took the news of the Hamas capture…of a dolphin…

  • Earlier today, Hamas captured an Israeli spy dolphin. After several hours of torture, the Zionist animal had only this to say:”AAAK EEEK SQUEAK!!!!”
  • Hamas was water boarding the dolphin trying to make him confess, until they realized he actually liked it….
  • 5:00 PM The Zionist spy dolphin ate a tuna.
  • 5:01 PM The UN condemned it for ethnic fish cleansing.
  • Ephraim Gopin adds: 5:07 Rabbanut declares it will not give kosher certificate to fish deemed kosher in Spain. All fish will have to dunk in mikva in Israel first.
  • Ira Wise adds: 5:08 Spain declares all fish forgiven and welcome to return to Spain. Please!
  • SeaWorld’s traveling water show has canceled the Zionist spy dolphin’s performance in Spain until it clarifies its position on Palestinian statehood.
  • After the capture of the Zionist spy dolphin, the International Red Cross has pressured the Hamas leadership into allowing the animal a phone call to Dr. Doolittle.
  • Following the breaking news of Hamas’s newest hostage, the National Football League is denying reports that a team has changed its name to the Miami Zionist Flipper Spies.
  • Liron Kopinsky:”Israel has entered into negotiations to trade one dolphin for 1,257 Hamas frogmen.”
  • Dave Bender: IDF Signal Corps officials, speaking off the record, said the mammal’s last radio message before the transmitter went dead was “…and thanks for all the fish,” accompanied by two tweeted hashtags: “#freewilly!” and “#SorryCharlie.” StarKist could not be reached for comment.

And my small contribution defending the Zionist spying dolphin: I don’t think he did it on porpoise!


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Paula R. Stern is the co-founder of Retraining4Israel (www.retraining4israel.com), a new organization working to help olim make aliyah successful. Paula made aliyah over 30 years ago with her husband and their three children. She lives in Maale Adumim and is often referred to as “A Soldier’s Mother”. She is now a happy wife, mother of five (including two sabras), and grandmother, happily sharing her voice and opinions with others. She is also a senior tech writer and lead training instructor at WritePoint Ltd. (www.writepoint.com). Please visit her new website: www.israelheartbeat.com