(Originally posted on author’s website, Emes Ve-Emunah}
As I have said so often in the past, Agudah spokesman, Rabbi Avi Shafran is one of the ‘good guys’. He is a brilliant writer and eloquent spokesman for his organization. Although I do on occasion disagree with him, sometimes strongly, there is not a doubt in my mind that he is a man whose ideals are expressed with intellectual honesty. That is reflected in an introspective article he wrote about his once and momentary flirtation with heresy which he wrote about recently in the Forward.
This is something everyone should read. When the chief spokesman for Agudah talks about his own battle with heresy, that is news.
He revealed that he was once a skeptic about the truth of Judaism. It was because of a book he read that questioned basic belief. True – it was at the very tender age of 12. But a 12 year old that reads intellectual books on matters of faith – is quite a mature 12 year old.
Rabbi Shafran notes that it did not last very long and goes about reciting the reasons his beliefs were quickly restored. Reasons for believing in God and the truth of Judaism that are similar to my own.
But the fact that he discusses it at all tells me that he is an intellectually honest individual… someone that does not sacrifice truth for expediency or popularity. He is a thinker. He is not someone that took every word he was ever taught and refused to see anything else. He considered the validity of a book which – at the time – seemed like it put forward legitimate refutations of the Judaism in which he was raised. He did not deny his doubts. He instead confronted them.
Contrast that with what has in the past been the attitude of educators in the Yeshiva world. You could not – would not dare ask the kind of questions raised in Rabbi Shafran’s mind. Not to mention be caught dead reading a book like that. Anything remotely questioning one’s faith would be met with stern warnings not to ask questions like that as they amounted to Kefira – heresy! Rabbi Shafran must have well known that even at age 12. So he kept those thoughts to himself. At age 12 he did not want to rock any boats. In the end he found all by himself – the answers that restored his faith .
That is as much a tribute to Rabbi Shafran’s parents as they are to him. His parents did not shelter him from exposure to the secular world. It was their awareness and tolerance of it that led him for a brief moment in time to doubt his Judaism. And it was that same tolerance and that allowed him to reach his own conclusions about Judaism. Which in my view is a much stronger basis for belief than unanswered questions of dogma that remain repressed in the deepest recesses of your mind. With niggling doubt just a hairbreadth below one’s consciousness.
Rabbi Shafran did to have to open himself up to the world like this. He could have avoided admitting that he once harbored doubts about his religion. But being the intellectually honest person that he is, he decided to reveal those doubts to the public in the widely read secular news medium, the Forward. Which can re-open challenges to Judaism that abound today.
It is this experience that accounts for his attitude towards those who have had similar questions and doubts about Judaism raised today by new challengers – and have found different answers than he has. It also made him non judgmental about coreligionists that have gone OTD, And compassion for those who left left Orthodoxy because of very negative personal experiences that were mishandled by the Frum world they left. Here is how he puts it: