As for other lifestyle choices our children have been taught in their yeshivas that mixed dancing and mixed swimming are not in accordance with halacha and that women must cover their hair after they marry. However even among our so-called ultra-Orthodox younger generation there are those who have televisions and VCR’s in their homes who attend movies the theater sporting events and who regularly surf the Internet.
Indeed this generation has not rejected Modern Orthodoxy it has merely taken the education and upbringing provided to it by its schools and families and has evolved Modern Orthodoxy to meet its own needs and aspirations as Jews.
Many defenders of Modern Orthodoxy decry the apparent rejection of a college education in favor of yeshiva. While many Modern Orthodox youth may embrace the yeshiva-only lifestyle an equal number do not. Furthermore just as there are Modern Orthodox young adults who reject college there are ultra-Orthodox young adults who attend college. Even many of those who attend yeshiva exclusively for extended periods of time after high school obtain college degrees which enable them to attend graduate school at a later date. For proof I merely have to look at the choices made by my own children’s friends. I also cannot help but acknowledge the many ultra-Orthodox doctors accountants attorneys and business men and women with whom I deal with on a daily basis.
The reality is that our synagogues permitted mixed dancing to prevent a generation that was only partially yeshiva- educated from going elsewhere to socialize. At least the shul provided Orthodox adult supervision kosher food and other Orthodox Jews with whom to socialize. Many of my generation’s parents met at these events.
The public compromises of earlier generations enabled the barriers of prejudice to be breached. The success of that generation cleared the way for my generation and that of my children. An earlier generation’s thirst for Torah-true values and the realization that yeshiva education and the rabbinate had to be in the hands of professionals set the stage so that these professions are now attractive career choices for our community’s best and brightest.
I would contend that the real issue is not the rejection of Modern Orthodoxy but the fallacy of having ever considered ‘Modern Orthodoxy’ as a specific branch of Judaism. I believe that Modern Orthodoxy was a form of Orthodoxy which required strict adherence to basic laws of Shabbat and kashrut while permitting its adherents the ability to assimilate enough to gain acceptance as part of American society at-large.
Our youth have not rejected Modern Orthodoxy. They have discovered instead that they can be valued and contributing members of society without having to make many of the compromises that had to be made by earlier generations.
My grandmother who was in her 80s and lived alone used to call my mother each morning to let her know that she was awake and fine. One Sunday morning my mother frantically called my home. She had been attempting to reach my grandmother on the telephone and there was no answer. Her neighbors also did not answer the telephone. My mother and I jumped into my car and headed for my grandmother’s home.
As we ran to her building we saw her leaving the building’s laundry room pushing her shopping cart. Surprised to see us my grandmother said that early that morning she realized that Monday was Rosh Chodesh Av the start of the Nine Days before Tisha b’Av during which it is customary not to unnecessarily launder one’s clothing. She decided to do her laundry early that morning when she would not have to wait for an empty machine. She told us that she had not called my mother so as not to awaken her on her day off from work.
