Tom Friedman is certainly a man who turns silly when talking about peace in the Middle East. There was that time he tried to trade journalism terms like baseball cards with a Saudi daily; oh and then there was his Saudi peace plan – remember that?
February 17, 2002 was a date that a lot of people in Jewish circles remembered for months afterward. It became the easiest way to refer to the peace plan ostensibly proposed by Prince Abdullah bin Abdul Aziz al-Saud which was revealed in Friedman’s column of that date. The idea of the plan itself seemed kind of preposterous coming as it did from a ruler of one of the most oppressive countries in the world. But what was hilarious was Friedman’s way of presenting it – the drama the intrigue of a peace plan in the prince’s drawer. It could play like a Broadway musical:
Prince: I have the plan – it’s in my drawer. Friedman: In your drawer? Prince: In my drawer! Should I get it? Friedman: Should you get it? Prince: Should I get it? Friedman: Might he get it? Prince: Then I’ll go get it! (Crescendo Together): We’ve a peace plaaaan! (Choir Subtly): It was in his drawer… (Curtains)
Friedman’s approach to the Geneva Accord is much the same.
So Much Drama
The night is like a stage show with Tom Friedman as actor/writer/director. It’d be a one-man show if Friedman didn’t allow Beilin Rabbo and some policy analysts to play bit roles.
Friedman has a lot of practiced lines and he opens with a few; they’re not necessarily truths but they are considered such in Friedman’s world.
What won the Cold War was the rebuilding of Germany and Japan and there is no war on terrorism that does not address that issue of the Israeli-Palestinian conflict. While those points are arguable they’re more the chocolate shavings on top of his larger dish of fluff – there’s little point in arguing.
His points on the Geneva Accord are more worthy of response. He says that Sharon will not pursue peace that ‘the man with the way does not have the will ‘ which ignores that Sharon did work within the road map for a while even releasing some prisoners who would eventually kill Israeli civilians.
The anti-Sharon path he says is part of the Geneva Accord: What you’re seeing is an explosion of popular will. Except explosions of popular will are usually evident in demonstrations and protest – even Beilin and Rabbo don’t overstate as much as Friedman in selling their plan (if indeed it is their plan and not Friedman’s anymore).
Friedman tells a cute story about a Palestinian kid he came upon and asked if he’d fight in defense of Arafat to which the kid said yes. So Friedman asks the kid what he wants to do and he says it’s to go to the University of Memphis to study engineering. Friedman loves these kinds of stories and he loves to simplify them with cute lines as he does now saying the kid is ready to die for Yasir Arafat but he wants to live for Memphis. The irony that the fulfillment of the Geneva Accord requires Arafat’s removal or departure is lost on the man.
He announces the impending disaster in Israel – Those ticking sounds keep getting louder and louder. Israelis and Palestinians really aren’t worried about the ticking sounds – it’s the booming that gets to them.
He recalls a Nextel billboard on a Middle Eastern street that says Good things come to those who don’t wait. Terrorists are notoriously impatient. Again the irony is lost. He announces the advertising slogan and pauses – the crowd sits silent. The Zen of Tom Friedman.
