Erica Pelman is a spiritually-driven woman. She is founder and director of “In Shifra’s Arms” (ISA), an organization that offers aid to pregnant Jewish women of all religious backgrounds practically, financially and emotionally. Its arms are open to any pregnant woman in need whether single, divorced, separated, or from a financially-strapped family. “Presently, we are a small operation with a big vision,” Erica states. “I would love to see it grow far beyond its founder.”
Some women require short-term help, perhaps just someone to talk with a few times, while others require long-term assistance. “We help whoever calls,” Erica says simply. Sometimes, she relates, parents will call about their daughters, wanting to know what they can do for them. “We do not push an agenda,” Erica continues. “We are apolitical and although our social worker, Fraida Nathan, and I are Orthodox, we do not promote any religious ideology. Women reach out to us in a vulnerable state. Twenty-five percent of them are in abusive relationships and many who call are currently not married. They let us know what they need and we try to give it to them.”
The inspiration for In Shifra’s Arms began ten years ago when an unmarried college friend called Erica in tears and confided that she was pregnant with no option but abortion. “I was heart-broken and I had no words of comfort to offer. I felt her pain. Because I love her so much, I also love any child she could have had,” Erica recalls. Years passed, Erica saw married friends struggling with infertility. “I realized there were people who would have loved to adopt my friend’s baby. I wondered what support my friend could have gotten to continue the pregnancy.”
In 2008 Erica began to research support for Jewish pregnant women and found that while there were Jewish organizations in Israel, there was no organization in the United States to help Jewish women who wanted to continue with their pregnancy but due to emotional or financial constraints felt they couldn’t. That’s when Erica sprang into action and spoke to the women in her synagogue about filling this need. Interestingly enough, after many years of struggling with infertility, Erica discovered she was pregnant.
Several months prior to the birth of her first son, Erica left her position at the Department of Labor in Washington D.C. and began working on establishing In Shifra’s Arms with the women in her synagogue. They created a website and began training volunteers to answer calls for a hotline.
Erica maintains that unplanned pregnancies among Jewish women are a reality that as a community we need to acknowledge. Otherwise these women may feel forced to approach a Christian organization. One such woman escaping from an abusive relationship, homeless and pregnant felt she had nowhere to turn but to a Christian maternity home. (The local Jewish social services were unable to find her housing.) Once she was there, she discovered that Christian Bible study and prayer were mandatory and she felt incredibly uncomfortable. ISA got involved and while a Chabad rabbi found her a place to stay with a Jewish family, ISA paid the rent. Eventually the organization helped her return to her native Israel where she gave birth and is doing very well. “Her emails tell us that her baby is the best thing that has ever happened to her.”
Thankfully, ISA has other such happy ending. “Before we were even set up,” shares Erica, “we received a call from a woman whose friend was unmarried and pregnant with no place to live. We sent her whatever financial assistance we could to help her. Her baby is 5-years old this month,” Erica says proudly.
