Perhaps the most horrific aspect of any custody fight is the Solomon-like role-reversal children find themselves in when asked which parent they’d prefer to live with. For these children it’s a lose-lose situation, as either answer will upset one of the parents. The extreme stress, anxiety and guilt accompanying this request – made by the judge and the respective lawyers, often in the judge’s chambers – can psychologically damage a child for life and compromise his or her relationship with both parents, with siblings, and later with society in general.

Yes, having to sit down with a soon-to-be ex-spouse to try to resolve the distribution of mutual assets – children included – can be stressful and painful, especially if the parting couple can’t stand being in the same room anymore. But it’s nothing compared to the hell awaiting them if they don’t.


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