One of the oldest and most foundational teachings of Pirkei Avot asserts: “Derech Eretz Kadmah L’Torah” – the “ways of the land” precede Torah and mitzvot. This does not necessarily assign greater importance to the “ways of the land” over Torah or mitzvot. Instead, it emphasizes that, developmentally, the “ways of the land” must come first. Before excelling in Torah study and deepening our commitment to religion, we must first give attention to derech eretz.
But what exactly are the “ways of the land” that this proverb refers to as preceding Torah?
In the 19th century, Rabbi Shimshon Raphael Hirsch, responding to the challenges of Jewish emancipation in Germany, developed an ideology called “Torah im derech eretz.” He borrowed this term to advocate for the integration of Torah values with participation in broader gentile society – economically, politically, and professionally. While his usage was innovative and suited to the era’s cultural circumstances, it was a borrowed application of the term.
Often, the phrase “derech eretz” is misunderstood as referring simply to moral or ethical behavior – acts of tzedakah, compassion, and sacrifice, or gemillut chasadim. According to this approach, it refers to moral codes and ethical behavior.
However, this is not the true intention of derech eretz. The Torah already provides other terms, such as chesed (kindness), tzedakah (charity or righteousness), shalom (peace), yashar (uprightness), and tov (goodness), to describe the various expressions of ethical and moral behavior.
So, what then does derech eretz actually mean, and why must it precede Torah and mitzvot?
Social Courtesies
The most accurate and literal translation of derech eretz is “the ways of the world.” Every society establishes its own codes of conduct to ensure more polite and civilized interactions. These codes of politeness are highly context-specific and differ from period to period and from location to location. The adage “Derech Eretz Kadmah L’Torah” emphasizes that, before aspiring to lofty religious accomplishments, a person must first follow the conventions of the society they inhabit.
These conventions of politeness include general manners such as saying “please” or “thank you,” and smiling or nodding at people to acknowledge their presence, rather than passing them by and ignoring them. Politeness is expressed by yielding your space to others – such as driving courteously or offering your seat to someone who needs it – and by cleaning up after yourself in public spaces. It manifests in waiting patiently in line while others have their needs served, as well by by speaking softly, to minimize unnecessary and potentially disturbing noise. Similarly, derech eretz mandates that we offer an “excuse me” if we bump into others or inconvenience them. Finally, it instructs us to assist others in small acts of respect such as holding the door open.
These are not acts of morality in the same way that charity or acts of compassion are. They are common decencies that people who inhabit the same city, country, or world should extend to one another.
You might think that religious experience transcends derech eretz. After all, religion aspires to eternal values and ideals, which surpass specific social conventions of a particular time and place. Yet this Mishna reminds us of the important principle that the high can never stand without the low. Torah isn’t meant to create an alternate reality, but to infuse our current reality with meaning and divine presence. If Torah comes at the cost of derech eretz, it becomes severed from our current reality and risks becoming insulated, isolated, and irrelevant to our world. Torah and religion must be tied to the simple decencies we extend to others in our daily interactions.
Redemption Can Wait
The description of Moshe redeeming the Jewish people in Parshat Shemot reinforces the significance of derech eretz. After over two centuries of horrific suffering and nightmarish slavery, finally, a hero has been appointed to redeem our people. Hashem instructs him at the burning bush to hurry back to Egypt, announce the geulah, and end the persecution. Every minute counts as people are being brutalized and murdered daily. History is awaiting Moshe with bated breath.
Yet, instead of proceeding immediately to Egypt, southeast of the Sinai Desert, he makes a detour back to Midyan, to the east of Israel. This long, roundabout route consumes precious time. Why the delay?
Moshe felt that it was inappropriate to hurry off without at least formally seeking his father-in-law’s permission. Yitro had adopted Moshe as his own when Moshe needed him most. Moshe was a fugitive from Egypt, and Yitro offered him safe haven, food, shelter, and ultimately his daughter’s hand in marriage. It was not proper to leave without first saying goodbye. Despite the precious time this wasted, it was a crucial moment of derech eretz at the seminal moment of Jewish redemption. The high can never stand without the low. Jewish history, and redemption, cannot be built without derech eretz. Derech Eretz comes before Torah. Derech Eretz comes before redemption.
An Impolite Society
Is our society veering away from derech eretz? Are we becoming less sensitive to courtesy and politeness? There seems to be a growing shift toward rudeness, where we feel free to express ourselves and behave with little regard for others.
This shift can be seen as an overreaction to the excessive and harmful politeness which is often referred to as political correctness. PC and excessive manners can stifle direct and honest conversation and suppress healthy confrontation. In an attempt to be considerate, we became too agreeable, avoiding clear, honest exchanges. At some point, we became too polite for our own good.
The cultural pendulum now has swung the other way, where our conversations have become louder and more aggressive, with constant interruptions and increasing disrespect. Public and online discourse is marked by hostility, name-calling, and personal attacks, often exacerbated by the anonymity that the internet provides, enabling negativity and harassment without accountability. The erosion of derech eretz has encouraged disregard for public spaces and boorish behavior in public without sensitivity to others.
Because of this cultural recoil away from over-politeness society often rewards those who offer straight talk, even when it comes at the expense of insulting and demanding others. This style may feel more real and honest than the stifled and regulated language dictated by political correctness. However, while it may be more direct, it is also less polite and far removed from the principles of derech eretz. These are not the ways or codes of conduct upon which religious nature and experience can be built. While it’s important to avoid the extremes of performative and excessive politeness, we must also guard the essential decency respect and consideration we show one another. Without basic decency and politeness, Torah lacks the essential foundation upon which it can firmly stand.
Politeness and Unity
The word of the year in Israel and for Jewish communities around the world has been unity, or achdut. We are deeply divided politically, ideologically, and religiously, and our enemies seek to exploit these cracks. In our search for this elusive unity, perhaps it would be wise to start with Derech Eretz – in the way we speak about one another, especially our adversaries, and in how we interact with people.
Derech Eretz acknowledges our shared experiences and shows respect for our collective shared existence. Greater attention to derech eretz can serve as a strong foundation upon which to build achdut.
Derech Eretz comes before Torah. Derech Eretz comes before redemption. It also comes before achdut.
