Being flawed human beings living in our own highly depraved culture, we are influenced to put external glamor above many other factors that are in fact much more important to a successful marriage. Often what seems to be a negative asset or situation, to the point that we want to close our mind and walk away, can prove to be otherwise – even beneficial – when seen from a different angle.
Under normal circumstances, Rashi would have avoided looking at a female rider, let alone taking in all her details, and turned his back. How many singles walk away from or don’t even begin to consider a shidduch because certain factors they think ought to be in place are not? Rashi realized that what he beheld in this instance was a heaven-sent resolution to a Torah problem.
How many times does God put us in front of the right shidduch, but because He grants us freedom of choice to look at it from various angles, we see it one way, notice something we think is undesirable, and want to walk away?
Viewed from another angle, however, that very same factor could well be beneficial to our particular situation if only we’d open our eyes and see the whole picture.
In any shidduch situation we have to weigh the pros and cons and seriously consider the shidduch if the pros outweigh the cons and we can see ourselves living with those cons. The lesson from Rashi’s story is that sometimes we err and confuse a pro for a con.