Question: I am very appreciative and, if I might add, flattered that you answer and publish many of my questions. Due to your superior knowledge, I am always confident when I send in a question that I will receive a proper response. I wonder if you could address whether one should say Birkat HaGomel after flying even though flying is statistically safer than driving. Also, do women say HaGomel as well or only men?
Menachem
The Talmud (Berachot 54b) states that there are four people who must say HaGomel, with the Rivash and Rav Gershon disputing whether this list is exclusive or not. Rabbi Tuvia Goldstein maintains that modern-day air travel cannot be compared to the types of danger listed in the Gemara, and thus one need not say HaGomel after flying. Rav Moshe Feinstein, however, argues that flying is inherently dangerous since only the airplane separates the passengers from death. If the airplane suddenly stops functioning, the passengers will almost certainly die. Last week we focused on the text of the blessing of HaGomel and the congregation’s unusual response to it.
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The question arises: Why don’t we just say Amen after HaGomel as we do after every other berachah? (The response of “Mi shegemalcha…” is not found in the Talmud. It is first noted by the Rambam [Hilchot Berachot 10:8] and codified by the Shulchan Aruch [Orach Chayim 219:2].) My late dear friend and colleague, HaRav Yaakov Simcha Cohen zt”l, discusses this question in his Prayer the Right Way (Urim Press).
He writes that a halachic decision from HaGaon HaRav Yosef Eliyahu Henkin, zt”l (Teshuvot Ivra, siman 5), on saying amen after the berachah of Dayan HaEmet sheds light on the matter. Rav Henkin contends that we don’t say Amen after hearing this berachah because it is not advisable to say Amen in response to something bad. Although the Talmud obligates us to bless G-d for both the good and the bad (Megillah 25a), this does not mean, says Rabbi Henkin, that we should respond to hearing bad news by saying Amen.
What does Amen actually mean? Rabbi Henkin contends that when a person says Amen, he is essentially saying: “So shall it be in the future.” Since no one desires or wishes a mournful or tragic experience to occur in the future, we do not say Amen in response to Dayan HaEmet.
This line of argument may also explain why we say “Mi shegemalcha” in response to the berachah of HaGomel. This berachah is recited to express appreciation and thanksgiving to Hashem for delivering one from danger. Since no one desires to live through more dangerous experiences, it perhaps is inappropriate to say Amen. We therefore say “Mi shegemalcha” instead.
In addition, the Gemara states (Berachot 53b), “Gadol ha’oneh amen yoter min hamevarech – Greater is the reward for the person who says Amen than for the person who says the berachah.” If people said Amen after HaGomel, they would, in a sense, be saying that they have more gratitude to Hashem than the person who survived the dangerous experience. Since this sentiment would be a strange one to express, our sages decided that we should say “Mi shegemalcha” instead.
It’s true that some people say Amen before saying “Mi shegemalcha,” but the Piskei She’arim (siman 24), commentary of the Sh’ar Efraim (sha’ar 4, halacha 30), notes that the Shulchan Aruch and the overwhelming majority of rabbanim do not obligate one to say Amen prior to saying “Mi shegemalcha.” Apparently “Mi shegemalcha” should be said in lieu of Amen, not in addition to it.
(To be continued)