Is It Proper To Take A Selfie?
Much depends on context. I am one of those people who will approach strangers taking selfies at tourist attractions and offer to take their picture. On a recent trip, I did it about a dozen times and not one person refused my offer and each person then reciprocated for me. Bravo for the casual, amiable interactions of total strangers that make the world a better place.
But we should not get addicted to our appearances or ourselves as individuals, something that the modern value system unfortunately endorses. The Greek mythological figure Narcissus became so attracted to his own image on which he gazed in the water that he died staring at himself. The parable hits closer to home than we would like to believe; witness the number of people who cannot walk by a mirror without looking at themselves. The legacy of Narcissus endures.
Similarly, the Gemara (Nedarim 9b, Nazir 4b) tells the story of a man who became a nazir just so he would have to cut his beautiful hair at a certain point. His yetzer hara was energized by his own image that he saw reflected in water and he feared for his moral well-being.
Those constantly taking selfies overestimate their importance and focus on the less meaningful aspects of life. I have recently heard of a group of people who style themselves as “influencers,” but I have yet to hear of any of these “influencers” trying to influence anyone in any area of importance. It is all shallow self-absorption.
It is not inherently improper to take selfies. It is inherently improper to be consumed with the self. On vacation, selfies should yield to the kind assistance of strangers. In real life, selfies should be restricted to genuine need and not breed arrogance and insensitivity. Then the true self will emerge in all its legitimate glory.
– Rav Steven Pruzansky is Rabbi Emeritus of Congregation Bnai Yeshurun of Teaneck, New Jersey and author of “Repentance for Life” (Kodesh Press).
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One of the features of the human condition is the need for a person to be seen by others in what he perceives as a positive and impressive way. Of course, Chazal teach us that shem tov is important and a person should act in a way that brings splendor to the one who performs those acts. But it seems that that is limited to mitzvah actions and acting in accordance with the Torah life; the desire to appear successful – and with it, stylish, trendy or rich etc. – is what baalei mussar refer to as redifas hakovod. That which we are taught that kavod removes a person from this world is understood well when that urge preoccupies a person’s mind to the point that one needs to share experiences on a constant basis with others.
Certainly, there is nothing wrong with taking pictures in order to save memories or to share with people who would feel good by receiving them. However, sharing pictures with those that may become envious of our supposed successes is not a good midah and may bring on an ayin hara.
I would strongly advise anyone to limit picture taking, especially when it involves sending and sharing via social media and the like.
– Rabbi Yehoshua Heber is Rav of Khal Tomchai Torah at Yeshiva Torah Vodaath and Dayan at Bdatz Mishptai Yisrael.
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I apologize I’m not really into some of this “new age social media stuff,” but I assume a selfie is taken to forward one’s image to others. To date there are maybe only two or three pictures of my grandfather Reb Moshe Klass, zt”l, as he was modest and camera shy.
We find that the Mechaber (Yoreh De’ah 156:2) rules that a man is not allowed to look in a mirror, because of the prohibition of Lo tilbash gever simlas ishah, which encompasses all matters that are specific to women – men are so forbidden. The Mechaber does offer lenience for a medicinal therapeutic need or one who is shaving or cutting his hair.
Rema (ad loc) offers the further leniency that the matter is forbidden only in a place where men don’t do so, but if in a place where both women and men look into a mirror, then to do so is permitted. The gaon Rabbi Ovadiah Yosef, zt”l (Responsa Yechaveh Da’at vol 6:49) goes even further when he rules that in our present day and age and there is no such prohibition. In fact, in our society today a man as well as a woman has to be well groomed. Therefore one must be able to look at one’s self in the mirror.
The selfie in my estimation is a form of looking into the mirror, but as one poses for a photo takes it him/herself. The entire matter might revolve around modesty as I related from my grandfather. Unfortunately, too much on social media today lacks modesty. And what most are doing is not necessarily what we should do. Yet, I suppose if the photo is shot in a manner that does not betray modesty and the intention to do so is entirely innocent and just to share some good cheer, then it should be all right.
– Rabbi Yaakov Klass is chairman of the Presidium of the Rabbinical Alliance of America; rav of Congregation K’hal Bnei Matisyahu in Flatbush, Brooklyn; and Torah Editor of The Jewish Press. He can be contacted at [email protected] and [email protected].
