The problem is that doing so encourages avoda zara celebration, an issued Chazal address in Masechet Avoda Zara. Much better to give the gift in connection with Thanksgiving. At best, say “Seasons Greetings” instead of “Happy Holidays” to avoid promoting an avoda zara holiday.
– Rabbi Chaim Jachter is a prominent rabbi who serves as the rabbi at Congregation Shaarei Orah, the Sephardic Congregation of Teaneck, and is a popular Torah teacher at the Torah Academy of Bergen County. He also serves as a Dayan on the Beth Din of Elizabeth and has acquired an international reputation of excellence in the area of Get administration. He has authored sixteen books on issues ranging from contemporary Halacha, Tanach, Aggada, and Jewish Thought all available on Amazon.
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I am reminded of the time I gave a nice bottle of “cherry brandy” to the local vicar. I forgot that many of them don’t drink. He had a dilemma: How to acknowledge my gift without acknowledging his drinking. He wrote me a letter of thanks: “Dear Rabbi. Thank you for the lovely cherries. And the ‘spirit’ in which they were given.”
The Gemarah Avoda Zarah clearly states that giving gifts to non-Jews at the very time of their pagan holiday would result in them thanking their idols for their good fortune. As a Jew, you would be directly responsible for facilitating that and thus it is forbidden.
That said, it is safely assumed that most non-Jews today are (a) not typically idolatrous and (b) are not inclined to go running to their places of worship to offer thanks for their good luck in receiving the gift.
Moreover, a lot of leniencies have been offered over the years, with the goal of not causing ill-will among non-Jewish co-workers and improving general relationships (mishum aivah). More specifically, to quote the Shulchan Aruch (Yoreh Deah 148:12): “If one is sending a gift to a non-Jew in our times on the day on which they consider it significant to receive presents on that holiday: if possible, [the Jew] should send him the gift the evening before. If not, he may send it on the holiday itself.”
As other codifiers (Shach ibid) clarify: Delaying giving the gift until after the holiday would lead to the non-Jew resenting the Jew for having ignored the occasion, “especially nowadays when it is uncommon for them to go and thank [their deity, for the gift].”
In uncensored editions of Shulchan Aruch, the reference is explicated as being to, “the eighth day after Xmas, which they call ‘New Year.’” Which would mean that giving a non-Jew a gift on Xmas itself might still be problematic as supporting idolatry. But if you give it as a New Year’s gift, there’d be definite room for leniency.
Leading contemporary authorities today maintain that saying, “Merry Xmas” and the like would be deemed problematic as it is an outright acknowledgment of a pagan festival, and thus the same could certainly be said about gift giving in that context as well. But “Season’s Greetings” or certainly “Happy New Year” is not a problem. Hence, giving a gift or a tip to your mailman in that more generic manner is perfectly acceptable. (And you might even get your mail delivered intact and on time as a result).
– Rabbi Yitzchak Schochet is a popular Lubavitch lecturer and rabbi of London’s Mill Hill Synagogue
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There is much discussion by our Sages on this question. What ostensibly is involved is whether or not by giving a gift or a tip to your non-Jewish service workers at their holiday time, you are inadvertently participating in their holiday, which in many cases could involve promoting idolatry. However, in our times, especially in countries outside Israel, such as the United States, where the majority of residents are not Jewish, most rabbis are of the opinion that because of “darkei shalom,” the promotion of peace, it would be permissible.
– Rabbi Mordechai Weiss lives in Efrat, Israel, and previously served as an elementary and high school principal in New Jersey and Connecticut. He was also the founder and rav of Young Israel of Margate, N.J. His email is [email protected].
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In addressing the Jewish people concerning their interactions with the seven nations that previously inhabited Eretz Yisrael, whose land they were preparing to enter, the Torah says “Ve-lo sechanem” (Devarim 7:2). One interpretation of this directive, presented by the Gemara in Avodah Zarah (20a), is that it is forbidden to give these non-Jews a free gift (matnas chinam, a phrase which relates to the word “sechanem” in the passuk). The Meiri there (d”h kevar), among others, suggests that the intent of this commandment is to discourage excessive socialization and fraternization between Jews and non-Jews as a means of minimizing the chance of intermarriage, the prohibition against which appears in the very next passuk there, and the possibility of Jews adopting non-Jewish practices and lifestyles. This ruling is codified by the Rambam (Hil. Avodas Kochavim 10:4 and Hil. Zechiyah U’Matanah 3:11) as well as by the Shulchan Aruch (Yoreh Deah 151:11-12 and Choshen Mishpat 249:2).
Although the particular non-Jews referred to in the Torah there are the members of those seven nations, and there are indeed some authorities who limit this entire restriction against giving gifts to non-Jews to only those particular people (see Torah Temimah to Devarim there, No. 3), others hold that it applies to all non-Jews, but only if they are idolaters (see, for example, Shu”t HaRashba 1:8, Sefer HaChinuch No. 426), and the Meiri cited above also excludes civilized nations who live by proper and just laws. Still others, though, maintain that it applies to all non-Jews (with the lone exception of a “ger toshav,” a kind of quasi-convert, a status which is no longer in effect today); this seems to be the position of the Rambam (Hil. Avodas Kochavim 10:6) and it is accepted by the Beis Yosef (Choshen Mishpat 249, d”h assur) and others.
It is important to stress, however, that as pointed out by the Rosh in Avodah Zarah (1:19) as well as by the Ran in Gittin (20a in Rif, d”h kol ha-meshachrer) and the aforementioned Meiri, if a Jew has a working relationship with or is a neighbor of a non-Jew and thus stands to get something in return for his gift, meaning that the Jew will also benefit from the gift, giving it is permissible. It is also allowed if the goal of giving the gift is to foster a peaceful communal environment. The explanation for this idea is that giving a gift in exchange for favors, past or future, is similar to a sale, which is certainly acceptable. The Shulchan Aruch, in the sources cited above, rules accordingly. To express appropriate thanks by tipping a non-Jewish worker, especially knowing that this will help guarantee proper – or even better – service in the future would thus certainly be allowed. (Although it is clearly not etymologically accurate, some suggest that the very word “TIPS” is an acronym for “To Insure Proper Service” or something similar.)
It should be noted, though, that even when giving a gift to non-Jews is permitted, there is an additional concern with giving it on his or her holiday. The Mishnah in Avodah Zarah (2a) restricts even business dealings with idolaters around the time of their holidays; the Gemara later there (64b-65a), however, indicates that this prohibition applies only to actual idolaters, a ruling codified by the Rambam (Hil. Avodas Kochavim 9:2) and the Shulchan Aruch (Yoreh Deah 148:5 and 8). Still, the Rema there (No. 12) writes that a Jew should avoid participating in any celebratory event on a non-Jewish religious holiday and adds that it is preferable to give any gifts to non-Jews prior to the actual holiday and not on the day itself. It is thus proper for one who wishes to give something to non-Jewish service workers as an expression of gratitude to do so prior to the day of their holiday.
– Rabbi Michael Taubes has been involved in Jewish education, formal as well as informal, for over 40 years, serving both in the classroom and in various administrative posts. He is presently a Rosh Yeshiva at RIETS and Yeshiva University High School for Boys. In addition, he is the spiritual leader of Congregation Zichron Mordechai in Teaneck, N.J.
