Somehow, it seems as if hester panim is surrounding us. We see. We hear. We feel. We don’t know what to do.
‘Cleared for publication.’ These three words bring instant anguish.
I hear of teens questioning their parents, ‘will there be enough to say about me if I fall in battle one day soon?’ Anxiety. Worry. Fear. Sleepless nights for too many.
Children waiting by the window for their father to come home. Wives emotions constantly running through their bodies, terrified of the dreaded knock at the door. Mother’s hearts shattered into a million pieces. And the wounded! How many beautiful boys valiantly learning how to walk again. Even talk again. Giving their lives and limbs for Eretz Yisrael and for Am Yisrael.
Young women, wives who scarcely had time to dream. Now they stand before us, sharing painful goodbyes to visions of sun-kissed babies, and memories barely made. Some holding newborns, some with the shape of life to come whispering to us of the bittersweet times yet approaching. Toddlers clutching blankies grasp at their mommy’s shirt, seeking solace in the madness. Sabas and savtas who imagined dancing at their grandchild’s chuppah now grapple with an endless ocean of grief. They hold their photos gingerly as they speak of their beloveds, the next generation who lifted their spirits with their every smile.
What can give us comfort and strength?
Adar has arrived. “Mi shenichnas Adar marbim besimcha.” We are told that these days hold the capacity to discover the greatest simcha. But how does one feel joy when their heart has been broken?
Adar gives us a message of empowerment. Ani Dar – ‘I live with you’; Hashem speaks to us. No matter where we are in the world. No matter the time, the country, the generation. We must know that we are not here alone. Whether on the rivers of Babylon, the ovens of Auschwitz, or the envelope of Gaza, we are the precious children of Hashem. Avinu shebaShamayim dwells with us, loves us and never abandons us. True we may feel lonely at times. We may not understand the plans of HaKadosh Baruch Hu. We may feel as if the entire world has gathered against us in vile hatred for the Jew. But it is especially in those darkest of times that we plug into the power of Adar to embolden us.
Did the Jews in Shushan not feel the choshech? “L’hashmid, l’harog uleabed es kol haYehudim.” This is our story! We tell it to our children and our children’s children. “Shebechol dor vedor omdim aleinu l’chaloseinu veHaKadosh Baruch Hu matzileinu meyadam.” Hashem brings us His kindness, his miracles, and His great hand.
We must hold onto our story.
My 4-year-old granddaughter, Rachel, lives in Yerushalayim. The other day my daughter-in-law took Rachel out for a treat. At the table next to them was a woman sitting, eating her ice cream.
“What’s your name?” Rachel asked in her inquisitive way.
“Batya” replied the woman. “And what’s your name?”
The two began a conversation. After a few moments, Rachel asked “are you eating ice cream all alone?”
“Yes,” Batya answered. “I’m eating my ice cream all alone at my table. Isn’t that sad?”
“Don’t be sad,” said Rachel. “You’re not alone. Hashem is sitting with you. You never have to be sad. Hashem is always with you, wherever you go.”
It is time for us to take this little girl’s words to heart. Adar. Ani dar. Hashem is with us wherever we go.
Am Yisrael, do not be afraid. Just as the children of Shushan sang, so too, we sing until today. “Utzu eitzah vetufar….Ani esbol veamalet.” They will plan, they will connive, they will carry out… but Hashem will carry us and never drop us. We will endure.
