The widespread custom is to mention the Hebrew name of a sick person when praying on their behalf, along with the Hebrew name of their mother.1 This is because we find numerous examples in the Tanach and in the Talmud where people are referred to in connection with their mother regarding matters of Divine intervention.2 It is also explained that the mother’s name is used in prayer because there can be no question who a person’s mother is. There are always people present when a woman gives birth who can confirm such matters. King David would refer to himself as “Ben Amatecha” – “son of Your maidservant” – rather than “son of Yishai.” Nevertheless, mentioning the mother’s name might not be truly necessary. In fact, we find that Moshe Rabbeinu did not even mention Miriam by name when he prayed for her to be healed from her skin affliction. He merely prayed, “El na refa na la – G-d, please heal her.”3
The halachic authorities are somewhat divided on the need to mention the name of a sick individual when praying for them. Several authorities rule that mentioning the name of someone when praying for them is optional.4 There is also a view that one does not mention the name of a sick individual when praying for them in their presence. However, when praying for them when not in their presence, such as in the synagogue, one is indeed required to mention their name.5 On the other hand, some authorities say that the name should never be mentioned.6
Nevertheless, when Yaakov was praying to be saved from his evil brother Esav, he was very specific, mentioning not only his name but also specifying that he was referring to “Esav who is his brother.”7 Based on this precedent, the Zohar is adamant that one must always mention a person’s name when praying for them.8
Common custom follows the view that the name of a sick person need not be mentioned when praying for them in their presence but that it must be mentioned at all other times. One who does not know the Hebrew name of the person one is praying for can use their full English name.9 So too, one who knows the person’s Hebrew name but not the mother’s Hebrew name, should use the father’s Hebrew name instead.10 If, for whatever reason, one is unable to mention the name of a person when praying for him, one should still pray for him.11
One may even mention a person in prayer by merely describing them. When Esther prayed to be saved from Achashverosh, she simply prayed “to be saved from the dog,”12 without mentioning his name. As such, one should not hesitate to pray, for example, “G-d please send a refua shleima to the person who I saw [or heard] was hit by a car this morning,” and the like.
It should be emphasized that although praying on behalf of another person is certainly a commendable thing to do, the ideal prayer that G-d awaits is the personal prayer of the person himself who is in need.13
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- Shabbat 66b; Torah Lishma 399; Gevul Yehuda, OC 2; Zakan Aharon 1:11; Da’at Kohen 132.
- Rashi, Shabbat 66b; also in Berachot 55b according to the Ein Yaakov version.
- Bamidbar 12:13; Berachot 34a. Anecdotally, when the Ostrovtzer Rebbe visited the Imrei Emes, he asked the Imrei Emes to pray on his behalf, and gave him his and his mother’s full Hebrew name. The Imrei Emes said that there was no need for him to mention the Rebbe’s name since he was in his presence, as was the case when Moshe prayed for Miriam. Moshe did not specify her name and merely prayed, “El na refa na la.” The Rebbe responded that the gematria of El na refa na la is the same as Miriam Yocheved (“Refa Na” = 332 and “Miriam Yocheved” = 332). As such, Moshe in fact had “mentioned” the name of the person he was praying for along with the mother’s name, as is customary.
- Pri Chadash, OC 119:1.
- Magen Avraham 119:1; Chatam Sofer, Nedarim 40a.
- Sefer Hapardes 287; Yalkut Hareuveni, Vayeira.
- Bereishit 32:12.
- Zohar, Lech Lecha, Vayishlach 169.
- Orchot Rabbeinu 1:218.
- Midrash Talpiot, Choleh; Kol Bo 141; Aruch Hashulchan, OC 119:1.
- Rashi, Bamidbar 21:1.
- Megilla 15b.
- Bereishit Rabba 53:17.
