Once again, we are beginning to engage in the gigantic task of cleaning our homes of chametz, searching every nook and cranny of our possessions in earnest for those forbidden crumbs! It behooves us to understand why, during this season, we are pursuing so feverishly that which the rest of the year is an essential staple of our lives and the subject of which we bless Hashem in Birchas HaMazon by saying that he sustains his world with goodness (referring to bread).
The Gemara in Masechtas Berachos (17a) refers to the yetzer hara, the evil inclination, as the “yeast in the dough.” Just as yeast causes the dough to ferment, so does the yetzer hara enflame our passions and tempts us to “rise” and sin. The Radvaz (#976) writes that he could not find a satisfactory reason for the anomaly of why even a minuscule amount of leaven is prohibited biblically on Pesach, which is not the case by all other forbidden foods. He concludes that it must be because of its symbolic reminder of the yetzer hara and, therefore, it is understandable why one must purge such inclinations, even in the smallest of amounts! The Alshich explains that this is why the gematria of chometz is 138, the same numerical value as the word p’gima, meaning flawed. This is because chometz represents the flaws in a person caused by his yetzer hara.
In the same vein, the Zohar (Shemos 41:1) explains with this concept why we put out ten pieces of bread before we do the bedika, the formal search for chametz. The ten morsels of leaven represent the ten organs of man that can lead him to sin. These are the two hands, the two feet, the two eyes, the two ears, the male organ, and one’s mouth. (The Maharsha says that the nose isn’t counted since it rarely commits a sin.)
Thus, now we understand that when searching through our homes and worldly possessions for chametz, we are supposed to also be searching through our lives for any spiritual imperfections and purging them as well. Therefore, when cleaning the kitchen cupboards, we ask ourselves about our kashrus standards and when cleaning the den we think about how we use our free time. Similarly, the Rema (433:11) states that one is required to check their pockets for chametz, and the Shlah HaKodesh explains that this symbolizes the need to check that no dishonest money adheres to our pockets!
So, it is eminently clear now that Pesach is a time for introspection and teshuva. Indeed, the saintly Agudas Eizov, may Hashem avenge his blood, quotes from the Seforim Kedoshim that while the high holy days are times of repentance out of fear, Pesach is time to repent out of love.
Therefore, in the spirit of Passover spiritual cleansing which we are commencing, here is a list of fifty-two areas of life which perhaps could use some ongoing scrubbing and scouring. With these fifty-two commitments to better ourselves, (we will learn twenty-six this week and twenty-six next week), we will be more ready to bring our Pesach observance, the anniversary of the birth of the Jewish people, into the whole year!
1) I will make Hashem my very first thought every morning as I open my eyes with a passionate Thank You, a heartfelt “Modeh ani lefanecha,” and not with a sigh, “Oy, another day!”
2) I will wash my hands generously, not gingerly, removing the tumah, rededicating myself to the service of Hashem and to ready myself for prayer. So too, I will not just “touch the tap” when coming out of the bathroom or before my prayers, but will always wash my hands correctly. (The Chazon Ish said that correct morning netilas yadayim can ward off depression!)
3) I will make it a habit to greet my loved ones with a smile in the morning, to start off their days with the assurance that they are loved and cared for! This is a hard one but, oh, so rewarding.
4) I will adopt a mantra, “Do not scream in the home, do not scream in the home, do not scream in the home.” This one’s even harder!
5) I will say the birchas haTorah with special fervor and introduce this habit to my children, showing them how to say, “V’ha’arev na es divrei Torasecha – Please sweeten Your Torah in our mouths,” with a heartfelt plea that we should learn to enjoy our Torah studies. I heard from one of our Gedolim that this is a great segulah to acquire a zest for learning!
6) I will always try to attend minyan, recognizing that my prayers at home might be disregarded, but at a minyan they never are!
7) I will remember that davening is called the “Service of the Heart,” and if I pray without kavanah, merely saying words, I’m really missing out on most of the effectiveness of tefilah! As the Chovos HaLevovos states, “A prayer without thought is like a peel without the fruit and a body without a soul!”
8) With this in mind, I will finally make it my business to learn the meaning of the more difficult parts of prayer, such as the daily yom, recognizing how ridiculous it is that I should be saying it so many years without meaning. I will realize happily that when I study it once deeply, I’ll understand it for the rest of my life!
9) I will exert special effort to say the Shema meaningfully, knowing that on Shabbos I declare that all Jews say Shema, “Pamaiyim b’ahava – Twice with love,” and anything said with love has to be said with feeling! I will also remember that Gehinnom is cooled off for one who forces himself to slow down and meticulously say the Shema.
10) I will try to prepare myself whenever possible for the Shemoneh Esrei, making a quick list of what I want to have in mind when I say Refa’einu (thinking of those who are sick or depressed), Boreich aleinu (compassionately remembering those who are unemployed), Slach lanu (regretting my latest indiscretions), Shema koleinu (pleading that Hashem accepts my prayers), Sim shalom (having in mind those who are having problems with shalom bayis), etc. I will do this recognizing that such preparation is the best aid against the danger of my prayers becoming a mere habit or, chas v’shalom, a burden.
11) I will make it a point to always pray for others, realizing that this is the best way to have my prayers fulfilled, and will put special emphasis on praying for the success of my spouse and my parents.
12) I will put on my tzitzis with the awareness that it represents the 613 mitzvos, because the gematria of the word tzitzis is 600, plus the 8 threads and 5 knots, equal 613. And I will have in mind that although I can’t physically fulfill all the mitzvos (since we don’t have the Beis HaMikdash), I would really want to if I could.
13) I will put on tefillin with the excitement, fueled by the knowledge that, “Hashem aleihem yichyu,” one who puts Hashem upon himself will live. I will try to bear in mind while wearing them that I’m “tied” to the Torah way-of-life and will remember how Hashem took us out of slavery from Egypt in order that we be bound to Him.
14) I will make certain to learn something no matter what, at least once in the daytime and once at night!! Just like I find time for my bodily needs, I will find time for the needs of my soul, remembering that “Tchillas dino shel adam eino ela b’divrei Torah,” a person is first judged in the next world concerning his Torah study. I will also realize that it is incumbent upon me to learn Torah whenever I have idle time. I will think of the fact that if I throw all the mitzvos on one side of the scale and put a sefer on the other side, the sefer will weigh as much as all the other mitzvos combined. Such is the greatness of the mitzvah of Torah study!!
15) I will try to start learning Mishna Yomis, two mishnayos a day. As it says in the Medrash Talpios, Asher stands by the door of Gehinnom and doesn’t let anyone in who habitually learns mishnayos. We are taught that he who learns two mishnayos everyday will merit the Afterlife!
16) I will also try to learn some sort of halacha every day, e.g., Kitzur Shulchan Oruch, Mishna Berurah, Rambam, Hilchos Chafetz Chaim, etc., knowing that it says in Masechtas Berachos that Hashem loves the learning of halacha more than any other gateway of study!
17) Knowing how scarce my time is for Torah study, I will utilize wisely my drive-time, not frittering it away listening to the weather “on the eights” over and over again, or to some talk show host sharing his “wisdom,” or worse, exposing us to putting-down other people or embarrassing them publicly which is one of the most heinous crimes imaginable according to the Torah, punishable with the loss of one’s Afterlife if done habitually. I will instead fortify myself with a healthy dosage of Rabbi Miller, Rabbi Reisman, Rabbi Wein, Rabbi Frand, Rabbi Weiss, etc, turning my car into a veritable Beis HaMedrash, joyfully fulfilling the directive of uv’lechtecha vaderech, learning Torah while traveling.
18) I will try to review the weekly Torah portion twice with the Targum or Rashi each week, knowing that the Gemara promises that one who does so will live long. The Chofetz Chaim writes that this also aids in the development of emunah! I will put special emphasis on the Chumashim that I tend to neglect!
19) Since Dovid HaMelech instituted the saying of 100 brachos everyday to stop Jewish casualties, (this is currently so important), I will realize its efficacy and attempt to always do so as well.
20) I will say my brachos on food haltingly, with an empty mouth, holding the item in my right hand and putting special emphasis on the saying of Hashem’s Holy Name. I will not swallow the end of the bracha together with my food!
21) I will develop an intense hatred for any kind of machlokes, fighting, remembering the fact that even infants die because of the sin of machlokes (see Rashi in Parshas Korach) and that fighting chases away the Shechina.
22) I will actively be on guard not to speak lashon hara, training myself not to talk about people. I will choose only friends who are willing to adhere to such a practice. I will passionately pray to succeed at this everyday when I say, “Elokai, notzer leshoni meira!”
23) At the same time, I will purge the bad habit of slightly changing (or enhancing) a story by committing myself to being totally truthful, for it is the symbol of Yaakov, (titein emes l’Yaakov) our namesake, and it is the seal of Hashem!
24) I will develop the habit of thinking about Hashem when looking at a mezuzah and will stop to take note of the mezuzah each time I pass by, to ponder its message and promise to bring life to me and my children and to bring protection to my home!
25) I will get in the habit of saying Tehillim at available moments, harnessing the power of these age-old words said by our ancestors during every imaginable horror, to pray for the sick, the childless, the unmarried, and the impoverished.
26) I will find time to visit the sick for the Gemara in Masechtas Nedarim teaches us that it saves us from Gehinnom, protects us from suffering and from the wiles of the yetzer hara, promises us good friends, and will elevate us to the status that people will be honored just to be associated with us!
Whew, there’s so much to do and, of course, this is only a sample. Next week, we’ll have twenty-six more. Hatzlacha rabbah!
Transcribed and edited by Shelley Zeitlin.
