“Do not have hate for your brother in your heart…” (Vayikra 19:17)
The Rambam in Mishna Torah says that whoever despises another person from Klal Yisroel transgresses a negative prohibition.
The Sefer Mitzvos Hashem in negative precept 142 explains that it is a negative prohibition to hate another person as it says, do not have hate for your brother in your heart. This includes everybody in Klal Yisroel.
In the Avos D’Rebbi Nosson in the 15th chapter it provides an example of this that one cannot say, “This person I love and this person I hate.” Or, “I love chachamim – people who are wise and learned but hate amei haaretz – simple people.” The overriding mitzvah of vaahavta liracha komocha means we have to love everyone.
Our commentaries say that if a person has animosity in their heart towards another, it would actually be better to be open and tell them about it rather than to harbor ill feelings and transgress this prohibition.
The Chofetz Chaim, Rabbi Yisroel Meir Hacohen (1838-1933) says that when we contemplate and try to understand the results of this transgression, it becomes apparent that a person brings a spirit of ritual impurity upon themselves.
Every limb has its particular mitzvah in which a spirit of holiness rests. The mouth through saying tefilos – praying –; the hands through giving tzedakah or shaking the lulav and esrog; the feet when we walk to do a mitzvah; the ears when we hear words of Torah etc. Through fulfilling all of the mitzvos we are able to sanctify our entire body as it is written in Bamidbar 15: So that you may remember and perform all my commandments and be holy to Hashem.
This works conversely through committing a transgression. A person draws upon themselves an unclean spiritual ruach on that particular part of the body. As we learn in the Talmud (Kesubos 5b), a person should not allow their ears to hear idle talk because the ears are the easiest to harm. Through listening to forbidden speech a person draws upon their ears a spirit of tumah (uncleanliness).
The Talmud suggests that one should take their earlobe and bend it up to block out the forbidden speech. And so too one must try to guard every one of their limbs from any transgression and the resultant spirit of tumah.
We learn that the neshama is not dependent on one specific limb. However, the heart is considered to be that organ which a person’s life is dependent on. If one has hate in their heart they cause the spirit of tumah to be in their heart. And since it is the main life source of the human body, it thereby causes the tumah to dwell in the entire body.
The Chofetz Chaim points out that aside from this, in the future there is retribution for a person that carries hate in their heart. And this could actually be quite harmful for the members of a family who carry hate and animosity in their hearts.
We also know how bitter the results of hate, animosity, and jealousy can be. The dynamics of hate can ruin the peace of a home and the peace of an entire community.
The great Birchas Avrohom of Slonim related the following incident:
There was a great talmid chacham Rav Shimshon who was the Rav of the city of Zivlin. He was extremely great in Torah, very wise and exceedingly humble. The city of Zivlin had begged him to become their rabbi. He eventually agreed to their offer, but with two stipulations. The first was that everything important that would happen in the city would first have to be decided upon and approved by the Rav. The second was that he be able to learn the entire week in the main shul. Only Motzai Shabbos would he be open and accessible for any communal matter. The community immediately agreed to the stipulations and were extremely proud to have him as their spiritual leader.
Once his Rebbetzin went to the market in order to buy food for their home. The Rav and the Rebbetzin were people of very modest means. She was about to buy a very special and large fish when all of the sudden the wife of one of the rich people in town began to bid on the fish raising the price and, in the midst of their bargaining, she called the Rebbetzin a nasty name. The Rebbetzin was very insulted.
The word went out in the city that, since the honor of the Rebbetzin is like the honor of the Rav, the wife of the rich man had actually insulted the honor of the Torah. The report reached the leaders of the community who decided that they needed to protest this slight to the Torah’s honor and issue a punishment. However, they were bound by the Rav’s stipulation that anything important that was to be done in town could not be done without his haskama – approval. And according to the second condition, they would not be able to speak to him until Motzai Shabbos. They went to the Rebbetzin and asked her, “please when the Rav comes home on Shabbos inform him of what has happened and ‘prepare the ground’ for when we will meet with him to address this issue.”
Friday night when Reb Shimshon came home, he was shocked to see that the Rebbetzin was not sitting at the table that was set for Shabbos but rather she was sitting by herself by a small table at the corner of the room.
When he asked for an explanation, she said, “I do not deserve to be a Rebbetzin to sit together with the Rav. Therefore, I made my own table.”
He asked her, “Why do you think you’re not deserving?”
She answered, “the wife of the rich man called me a disgusting name and treated me disrespectfully.”
The Rav asked, “Did anybody say anything? Did the leadership of the community say anything at all? What happened to the honor of the Torah?”
The Rebbetzin replied, “The community is extremely upset and the leadership decided to impose a fine and a punishment. However, they will naturally need your approval before they do anything and they cannot ask for your acknowledgment before Motzai Shabbos.”
The Rav then asked her to please return to her place at the table and began singing Shalom Aleichem. As he was ready to make kiddush standing with a cup of wine in his hand, he said to her, “Could you tell me when this incident happened?”
She answered, “on Tuesday.”
Reb Shimshon grew pale. He put down the cup of wine on the table and he called out, “Tuesday! It happened on Tuesday! And from Tuesday until now you have had animosity in your heart towards this woman and you weren’t mochel her (didn’t forgive her)?!”
The Birchas Avrohom would often repeat this incident at public gatherings. He would say it over with great emotion and the entire assemblage would always be very moved by these words and would accept upon themselves to exhibit greater Ahavas Yisroel.
