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The Rama (the rishon), in Kesubos 40a, writes that even when a parent says that he is not interested in the action, the assei nevertheless applies. Rabbi Akiva Eiger (Yoreh De’ah 240:19) quotes from the Radvaz 1:524 (that derives from the Rama) that even though the Gemara in Kiddushin 32b states that a father may forgo his honor, this only provides for no punishment for not having shown honor and respect. But if a child nonetheless shows honor and respect, it is a kiyum mitzvah.

The Chayei Adam, in hilchos kibud av v’eim (67:1), says that the mitzvah of kibud av v’eim is the repayment of a debt that one owes to one’s parents for all the good they have shown him. One who does not show his parents respect and honor is considered a rasha, for the pasuk states that one who does not repay his debt is a rasha. This implies that the mitzvah of kibud av v’eim is a mitzvah bein adam lachaveiro.


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Rabbi Fuchs learned in Yeshivas Toras Moshe, where he became a close talmid of Rav Michel Shurkin, shlit”a. While he was there he received semicha from Rav Zalman Nechemia Goldberg, shlit”a. He then learned in Mirrer Yeshiva in Brooklyn, and became a close talmid of Rav Shmuel Berenbaum, zt”l. Rabbi Fuchs received semicha from the Mirrer Yeshiva as well. After Rav Shmuel’s petira Rabbi Fuchs learned in Bais Hatalmud Kollel for six years. He is currently a Shoel Umaishiv in Yeshivas Beis Meir in Lakewood, and a Torah editor and weekly columnist at The Jewish Press.