Above all, don’t allow the word “crisis” to paralyze you. As I pointed out last week, from “crisis” new life can emerge, new energies can be born – and new homes can be created.
From the genesis of Jewish history shidduchim always presented a formidable problem. When our father Abraham realized his days on earth were numbered he summoned the loyal executor of his estate. Abraham was the wealthiest man of his time. But when he called upon his executor to take an oath with regard to his estate, it did not pertain to real estate, livestock, jewels, servants, etc. Abraham’s only concern was the girl who would be chosen to be his son Isaac’s wife.
So a “shidduch crisis” existed even in the days of our father Abraham and has continued throughout the generations.
Making shidduchim is a Jewish parent’s most important undertaking. From the moment a baby is born we pray, “l’Torah, l’chuppah, u’maasim tovim” – “to Torah, to the marriage canopy, and righteous deeds.” We know that selecting the right spouse will be the most crucial decision in the life of this new child. It is through marriage, and the formation of faithful, G-d-fearing homes, that the Jewish people survive.
In conclusion, stand straight, smile, and let your heart be filled with faith and joy. Your basherte is waiting. He’s already here. You must only make the connection. And pray. In our morning prayers we make the blessing of pokeach ivrim – “blessed be G-d who opens the eyes of the blind.” When you say those words, stop for a moment, focus, and beseech the Almighty to open your eyes so that you might clearly see your intended and he in turn might see you.
If you wish, I would be very happy to speak with you and help guide you on the road to the right shidduch. Perhaps I can help you find that connection.
May you have a mazel tov very soon!