To your relief the King accepts your statement. “Now that is an accomplishment worthy of praise,” He says.
How does this apply to you? What does this have to do with caring for your ailing mother-in-law throughout the days of Yom Tov? Here’s how: After 120 years, when you stand in judgment in front of Hashem, you will desperately search for something to point to that would speak on your behalf – something difficult you accomplished despite all the challenges and provocations. So that ailing old lady who was so burdensome will become in the blink of an eye your defense attorney who verifies that you were indeed a blessing to her; that you were her energizer, her inhaler, the healing balm that soothed her pain and gave her comfort.
Therefore, whenever your head is bursting and you’re ready to scream, just remember you are dealing not with a woman who is your mother by law but a woman who one day will be the crowning jewel of your record in this world.
Now let us turn to the children. In the holy tongue boys are called bonim and girls are called bonos, which means “builders.” These little ones who do not allow you to rest for even a second and make a mess right after you’ve meticulously cleaned up the house are not simply children, they’re builders – builders of your house, your generations, your legacy, our entire nation. They are the ones who guarantee our Jewish survival.
When you realize this, you will tell yourself, “Who cares if there is noise, if there is mess? Baruch Hashem, my builders are strong.”
Pharaoh was determined to annihilate our nation. He knew that in order to do so he’d have to exterminate our children. Many of the evil dictators of the world followed this formula. But our children swore at Sinai they would forever remain builders of the Jewish people, builders of the Torah, builders of the holy land, and builders of their own families.
Our children have honorably carried out their pledge. So when those screaming little ones are getting on your nerves and have just smeared the walls of your dining room with ketchup or spilled a bottle of wine on your new carpeting, don’t be annoyed with them. Hug them and kiss them and whisper in their ears, “You’re going to be my builder, the builder of Am Yisrael. You will build Yerushalayim. You will study Torah and teach it to others. You will unite our people with love. Never forget your mission.”
If we could learn to look at our children from such a perspective, how different our lives would be.
There’s a beautiful story about the Klausenberger Rebbe, zt”l. While celebrating the first Rosh Hashanah after the liberation of the concentration camps he broke down in tears in the midst of his prayers.
“Where are all the children?” he cried out. “Nobody is making noise. There are no children here we have to ‘shush.’ Our builders are not here.” Then and there he promised himself he would build a hospital in Eretz Yisrael so that the cries of thousands of children would be heard as they entered this world to become bonim and bonos – builders of Am Yisrael and Eretz Yisrael.
Still you might ask, “Why on Shabbos and Yom Tov when we are together do we have these crises? Why can’t our celebrations be filled with serenity?”
At the end of the Book of Exodus we are again commanded regarding the laws of Shabbos. At first glance this is difficult to understand. The laws of Shabbos have already been clearly enunciated. Why the repetition?