A year later, I was on the floor of Congress as King Hussein of Jordan and Prime Minister Rabin embraced, and Rabin said the Shehecheyanu prayer, in Hebrew, thanking God for bringing us to that special moment. Once again we had tears flowing down our faces and you could feel the elation of the Jewish world.
So I know personally how strong the hope for peace is in the hearts of Jews the world over. And I have seen real progress towards peace. The peace treaty with Egypt stands today. The peace treaty with Jordan stands today. And though the Oslo accords did not achieve a final resolution of the conflict between Israel and the Palestinians, they did advance the cause of peace. The Palestinian Authority exists today because of the Oslo Accords, and the government of the Palestinian Authority and the government of Israel collaborate every single day on issues ranging from public safety to economic development. That is real progress.
If an opportunity for peace like the ones that presented themselves in the past came today, I know that Israelis, and Jews the world over, would embrace it instantly and overwhelmingly. So I believe deeply, with all my heart and soul, that while the Jewish community holds many different views about the path to peace, we are all seeking peace.
Still, the differences we have on how to move towards peace are real, and important. They deserve to be argued with passion and vigor. But also with great care.
I’ve already noted Hillel the Elder’s teaching about how we should respect each other’s points of view. But there is more to the Jewish teaching on the ethics of argument.
Inevitably, argument is not just about making your own case, but about criticizing the statements and actions of others. Such criticism is not only appropriate in Jewish tradition, it is one of the 613 commandments.
לֹא תִשְׂנָא אֶת אָחִיךָ בִּלְבָבֶךָ הוֹכֵחַ תּוֹכִיחַ אֶת עֲמִיתֶךָ וְלֹא תִשָּׂא עָלָיו חֵטְא:
לֹא תִקֹּם וְלֹא תִטֹּר אֶת בְּנֵי עַמֶּךָ וְאָהַבְתָּ לְרֵעֲךָ כָּמוֹךָ אֲנִי יְהוָֹה:
“You shall not hate your kinsfolk in your heart. Reprove your kinsman but incur no guilt because of him. You shall not take vengeance or bear a grudge against your countrymen. Love your fellow as yourself: I am the Lord.” Leviticus 19:17
“Reprove your kinsman” Criticize – Now that’s one commandment I bet we can all keep! But, as you probably guessed, it’s not that easy. There’s a catch. Actually, there are two catches.
First, we have to remember that the commandment to “reprove” is placed between the commandment to not “hate your kinsfolk in your heart” and to “love your fellow as yourself.” So the first catch is that we must criticize with love. And I don’t just mean that we are criticizing out of love, I mean that our criticism must be heard by others as coming from a place of love. Rashi, the great Torah commentator, says you must reprove in such a way that you do not publicly shame the person you are criticizing. Indeed, this requirement is so clear that some authorities on Jewish law have ruled that, if you cannot meet this standard, then you are exempt from the commandment to criticize in the first place.
Disagreements within the Jewish community about the right way to achieve peace between Israel and the Palestinians are arguments among members of the same family, and we need to talk to each other that way.
Second, Hillel the Elder, also taught us “not (to) judge your fellow until you have stood in his place.”
אל תפרוש מן הצבור, ואל תאמן בעצמך עד יום מותך, ואל תדין את חברך עד שתגיע למקומו