In business, education, and family life, a foundational truth is often overlooked: skills can be taught, but values are absorbed. A person can learn to model cash flow, manage operations, or build culture. Yet no course can reliably instill humility, sensitivity, or the instinct to serve beyond what is required. Those qualities come from values. Often passed down through family, lived experience, or religious tradition.
Not all values are universal, nor should they be. A yekkish home may emphasize thrift and discipline. A chassidic home may prize joy, shared experiences, and family time. Both are legitimate when lived with balance. One nurtures discipline, savings, and perseverance; the other cultivates connection and joy. These are different, not better or worse.
Some values, though, are foundational across Jewish life. One of them is to be gomel chesed – proactive, dignified service. The readiness to do more than asked, to notice what is needed before it is spoken. This ideal appears vividly in the Torah’s account of Rivka and echoes through rabbinic thought and even modern business culture.
When Avraham sends his servant Eliezer to find a wife for Yitzchak, the test Eliezer designs is simple yet profound: the right woman would not only offer him water but also volunteer to draw water for his camels. Eliezer asked only for himself. Rivkah saw the camels and acted. Her effort was immense – ten camels, each drinking gallons of water, requiring dozens of trips to the well. But the Torah’s focus is not on her exertion; it is on her awareness.
My mother often cites this story to show that true chesed lies not only in action, but in perception. The phrase “and I will also draw water for your camels” captures greatness itself. Rivka noticed what others might miss. She acted without waiting to be asked. It is the instinct to open a door for someone burdened with heavy bags, not because they requested help, but because they might need it. That is chesed, as Judaism defines it.
A powerful expression of this moral intelligence appears in the story of Rabbi Yoshe Ber Soloveitchik. Before Passover, a man asked whether he could use milk instead of wine for the four cups. Rather than answer, the rabbi handed him twenty-five rubles. His wife, surprised at the sum, noted that wine cost far less. The rabbi replied, “If he is asking about using milk for the four cups, it means he cannot afford meat either.” He answered not just the question, but the need behind it.
This is what the Torah asks of us: to act not only when called upon, but to see what is missing and respond with empathy and discernment. This was Avraham’s ability to “walk before G-d,” in contrast to Noach’s “walking with G-d.” Judaism holds this as a mark of spiritual refinement. We are called rachmanim, baishanim, and gomlei chasadim. Merciful, humble, and purveyors of kindness.
Yet Chazal also caution that kindness without judgment can cause harm. “One who is kind to the cruel will ultimately be cruel to the kind.” King Shaul’s misplaced mercy toward Agag led to devastating consequences, and in turn, to Shaul’s own cruelty toward the kohanim of Nov. Mercy without discernment is not a virtue.
This balanced, proactive chesed is not only a religious ideal; it is also a hallmark of organizational excellence. Consider the story of the Ritz-Carlton. When Chris Hurn’s family stayed at the hotel, his young son accidentally left behind his stuffed giraffe, Joshie. To comfort his son, Hurn told him that Joshie “is just taking an extra long vacation at the resort.” He asked the staff to find Joshie and to take a photo of Joshie lounging by the pool to support the story.
The Ritz-Carlton team went far beyond that. They staged a full photo series: Joshie sunbathing, driving a golf cart, making friends around the resort. They even mailed him home with a photo album chronicling his “vacation.”
That gesture was not the product of a manual. It reflected a culture where every employee is empowered to act beyond expectation. The staff saw a small emotional need and met it with creativity and care. That is what distinguishes the Ritz-Carlton. Their comfort and luxury are secondary to the feeling they create. The sense of being seen and valued. Their motto captures it perfectly: “We are Ladies and Gentlemen serving Ladies and Gentlemen.”
Eliezer did not ask for water for the camels, and Chris Hurn did not ask for an elaborate gesture. Greatness lies in perceiving the unspoken and acting on it. Organizations that internalize this value build stronger cultures and deeper loyalty.
It begins with hiring. Ask not only whether someone can do the job, but whether they notice the camels. “Tell me about a time you solved a problem no one assigned you.” “Tell me about a time you went beyond what was required.”
It continues through recognition, empowerment, and the stories leaders choose to tell. Embedding this value in a company requires more than posting it on a wall. It means creating systems that reward attentiveness and initiative. It means granting people the discretion to act with humanity. It means teaching that excellence includes asking the question behind the question and seeing the quiet needs others overlook.
In life and business, we are often asked only for water. Whether we also draw for the camels is what separates technical competence from moral leadership. Rivka became a matriarch not through words, but through awareness and action.
In every sphere – family, work, and community – you will encounter moments when someone asks for water. The choice to see the camels too defines who you are and how you lead.