One of the most important lessons I learned about music was from a girl I once dated years ago.
We were talking about mutual favorite music, and she mentioned a song called “Sigaliot” by David Broza, a song which I used to like just because of the nice melody. It turned out that apparently there was a whole story being told in the song. Since then, when I listen to this song I make sure to listen to the story.
The song tells about a couple who just got married; the wife is happy, but the husband is always moody and doesn’t tell her why. For three years in a row, she’s been getting poetry letters under her door from a strange man, letters which illuminate her youth.
Who’s the one who writes to you? Discover who’s sending the letter, together with violets wrapped in ribbon, without a name or any hint, the chorus goes.
When the girl I was dating mentioned the song, I said, “Oh, this song where the wife has a lover, and a love affair outside her marriage…” “No!” she said, “it’s her husband! It’s her husband who writes the letters and sends the flowers. He’s her mysterious lover. You need to listen to the words of the song,” she said. Turns out, in the last verse, the song indeed reveals that it is the husband who is sending the letters and the flowers. But the wife still doesn’t know and she is hiding the letters. (Honestly, the husband in the song probably just needs a good therapist.)
If you are curious, after a few dates, we broke up, but since then I made sure to listen to the words of the songs that I listen to. Listen to the words – good advice for anyone who likes music.
And why am I telling you this story? Because for years, I thought that one of my favorite songs by Avraham Fried, the song “Shtar Hatno’im” was actually “Shtar Hatana’im.” Tanna’im were the rabbinic sages whose views are recorded in the Mishna. Every time I used to listen to the song, I thought it was talking about the Tana’im from the Mishnah, perhaps about a shtar, a document, that some Tana’im had written.
Apparently not. The song is about a “shtar tena’im – an engagement contract between a chatan and kallah, a groom and a bride. And we’re going to talk about this song and explain it. What a beautiful song!
Shtar Hatno’im is one of the best known and most popular albums of Avraham Fried. The album was released in 1993. As a teenager, I used to listen to it. Some of the songs on it are still being played at weddings – with slight changes. For example, “Baruch Haba Melech HaMoshiach” is now very popular at weddings both in Israel and America, except it’s now “Baruch Haba Choson v’Kallah.” Other popular songs from this album are “Yosis Olayich,” “Hisyatz’vu,” and “Zeh Hayom.”
If there is something I really like in Avraham Fried music (and in general in chasidic music), it is that it stimulates curiosity in my kids. It makes them ask questions. This opens a whole discussion in the car (often I put music on when we travel) – a discussion where I can teach them new things. For example, another very famous song by Avraham Fried is “Tanyeh” (from the album We Are Ready). Or “Tiher” from the album Chazak. Talking about these songs can turn into a Torah shiur, a Torah lesson in the car. Not only Avraham Fried songs, but also songs by Dedi Graucher, z”l, Mordechai Ben David, and more. I pause the song, explain it, add more context and background, and then we listen to it again.
The song “Shtar Hatno’im,” as I said, is about a contract which contains the conditions between the bride and the groom regarding their engagement. Usually it’s done by the parents, where they discuss financial commitments, the date of the wedding, etc. In the past, a shtar tena’im, or just “the tena’im,” was more common. Today, it’s more complicated as there are some halachic consequences to the contract, and some poskim rule not to do it. (I’m not that knowledgeable on the issue. Obviously everyone should ask their rabbi.) From what I know, I think in Israel many people still do shtar tena’im, while in America, it’s something that is done on the wedding day, just before the chuppah. And then after completing the contract, the minhag (custom) is that the mothers break a plate, as a reminder of the Churban (the destruction of the Beit HaMikdash).
Back to the song. Who are the chatan and kallah in the song? In this beautiful song, the shtar hatno’im is between Hashem, the chatan, and Knesset Yisrael, or Klal Yisrael, the kallah. Yossi Green composed the song based on the text written by Rabbi Israel Najara. Rabbi Najara was a student of the Ari HaKadosh. He was also the Rabbi of Gaza. One of the most popular songs of Rabbi Israel Najara is “Ka Ribbon Olam” from the Shabbat zemirot which many sing on Friday night.
The song starts with a piano in the background and the beginning of the song is quiet and slow. Later on, there are some beautiful flutes and strings in the background.
The song describes the contract, the obligation and commitment of each side. The commitment of both sides to the “Torah HaKedosha,” the holy Torah. The commitment from the “Kallah,” from Klal Yisrael, is to dedicate themselves to the Torah and Avodat Hashem – “Limsor levava v’nafsha al haTorah V’al ha’Avodah.”
And now to the “arevim” part – the guarantors. From the chatan’s side is “Kol tzeva hashamayim” – the angels. And from the kallah’s side: “Tzadikei hador v’tinokot shel beit raban” – the righteous persons of the generation and the young children who learn Torah.
“Vehakol sharir v’kayam” – and the contract is valid and binding.
Now we can dance!
Once the song gets to the part where the chatan and kallah accept the contract, the music turns upbeat. Starting with clarinet, the sound slowly changes.
“V’haKohanim v’ha’am ha’omdim ba’azara,” and the Kohanim and the nation who stand in the courtyard [of the Beit HaMikdash], “kulam ya’anu v’yomeru ‘Mazal Tov!’” All answer and say “Mazal Tov,” concludes the song.
What a beautiful song. And it’s even more beautiful when you understand the words and what the song is about.
If you don’t yet have the album Shtar Hatno’im, I encourage you to get it. The entire album has some more great songs and I personally still like to listen to it.
