Dear Mrs. Bluth,
It is sad that I have to write to a Jewish newspaper and expose something that should be private in order to show people how wrong they are about who I am. I have tried to be friendly and not “in your face” about their misconception, with little to no success, which leaves me no other choice except this one. I am tired and so disillusioned with our community. How can people be so cruel and judgmental believing that I am unfit to live amongst them and be a part of the community simply because of my physical appearance – and carry this dislike or distrust of character over to my husband and children. I have taken to staying in my home most of the day and keeping to myself, as I feel I am being punished for something that is not of my making.
I suffer from Turret’s syndrome, which causes uncontrolled twitching of the face and body, loud guttural noises and offensive language – all sporadic and unintentional on the sufferer’s part. My husband also has a physical deformity and has suffered emotional trauma for which he takes medication, but is able to do simple tasks of a repetitive nature and works in a company that hires people with disabilities. We have two young children who go to daycare and stand little chance of ever going to yeshivos based on the community perception of us.
It has taken me almost two weeks to compose this letter, more to educate people than to expect anything from them. The saddest thing is that I have received more compassion and understanding from the non-Jewish workers who help us with our health issues, finances and daily existence than from our own Jewish community.
We have just come away from Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur (we no longer go to shul but daven at home), days on which we beg Hashem for His forgiveness and His blessings because we are His children and so different from the rest of the peoples of this world, yet look how we treat one another! Hashem has chosen to create my husband and myself (our children are baruch Hashem healthy to date) in bodies that are broken, yet our brothers and sisters shy away from us and will not accept us. My husband and I accept this and, even though we cannot know why Hashem has created us so, we believe that there is a reason and we will stay strong in our faith.
At this writing, we are planning our last move, to Israel, where we hope to stay and live amongst people who truly understand what it is like to be different, shunned by the world at large yet, are filled with compassion for one another. We know that our little ones will have friends and be accepted as equals. We hope to finally live as human beings in a community of people who understand that good and loving people aren’t always perfect in body, but are always perfect in spirit.
Thank you for letting us say good-bye to our brothers and sisters in both the United Kingdom and the United States. May Hashem look past our prejudices and injustices and bless us all with good health.
Dear Friend,
Your letter touched my soul. You asked me for nothing, yet gave so much of yourself. For this you have my sincerest thanks. I am deeply saddened for your excruciating experiences and for our horrible and callous mistreatment of your family and yourself. For these, please forgive us.
People generally have an intense fear and mistrust of anything or anyone that appears different from themselves, as you so poignantly pointed out. And yes, as Jews, so different in the eyes of the world, we should be more compassionate and caring towards those who are different, but seemingly we are not. We fear that which we do not understand, shy away from those who appear different and ignore one of our greatest mitzvos, “Ve-ahavta lerayacha kamocha.” May Hashem open our eyes and our hearts to grasp this mitzvah when He sends it our way, so that we can truly be Am Echad.
May your move to Eretz Hakodesh bring you peace, joy and the love and acceptance we failed to extend to you here. And, when you stand at the Kotel and touch the smooth, beautiful stones that encircled the once most holy and glorious place of all, the Beis Hamikdosh, be mispallel for us that we may shed our sins and join you in welcoming Moshiach Tzikainu bekarov beyomainu!
Dear Readers,
In the October 9th issue of Life Chronicles, we neglected to add that The Jewish Press is one of the only Jewish newspapers that proudly includes pictures of women in its articles and advertisements. We are proud of the modest women, the n’shei chayil, in our midst.