Dear Mrs. Bluth,
I am a young mother of two little children who lives in a walk-up apartment building next to a family who shares their apartment with their grandmother.
Unfortunately, she is very disruptive to all of us on our floor. She has been known to urinate and defecate in the hallway; one tenant even found this filth in her baby stroller after having forgotten to take it in at night. All the children are frightened of her, as she roams around aimlessly during the day, or until her family comes home in the late afternoon. She screams at everyone who passes and it is impossible to avoid her.
We have spoken to her family and, although they seem sympathetic and understand our predicament, they say she is senile and they have no means to get outside help and cannot afford to put her in a home. We have also approached the management about the unsanitary conditions resulting from this lady roaming the halls unattended, but they brush us off and say this is really not a management problem; it’s more of a family issue. We are at a loss at what to do. Is there anywhere we can turn for help without causing the family harm?
Dear Friends,
I truly empathize with everyone involved – the family of this afflicted lady as well as the tenants who have to suffer the visages of her illness. You, certainly, should not have to live with the stench of human waste at your doorstep, or feel threatened when you walk out of your apartment. Although this poor old soul most certainly is not at fault for her behavior or actions, you should not have to fear for your safety and that of your children. This woman should definitely be under some form of mental care and not left unattended.
There are a few options available to the family; I would suggest reaching out to a community-based agency for more information.
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Dear Mrs. Bluth,
I read your column as soon as I get The Jewish Press on Wednesday; you offer a little something for everyone, even if the problem(s) of the week does not pertain to us in general. That is why I want to ask you what your thoughts are about my situation.
I am in my late seventies, well preserved and full of life and a recent widow. Many of my well-meaning friends and family have tried to set me up on dates, but most of the gentlemen are in their eighties and are simply looking for a nursemaid, not a wife with whom to share whatever time that’s left to them. Can you imagine, one gentleman brought along a bag of his medications and asked me if I was familiar with any of the doctors he sees each month? Then there was the man who came in his Cadillac (with a driver) and didn’t stop talking about how wonderful his deceased wife was, how she ironed his underwear and trimmed his eyebrows and beard! And these were two of the better dates. So I stopped accepting blind dates and started going to singles events.
I recently met Zelig, a spry and lively 69-year-old retired proctologist, who had me rolling with laughter. We had a few amazing dates and are sure that we are right for each other.
I broke the news to my children and asked them to meet him. Sadly this meeting did not go well as my sons think it’s too soon and my daughters are aghast at our age difference. Poor Zelig tried so hard to lighten the mood but a heavy cloud of disapproval hung over the evening. My meeting with his children was wonderful.
