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In both situations the drivers were guilty. But they dealt with their circumstances in an honest and respectful manner. So while I appreciate your letter, my point is that if we speak to and treat people with respect and politeness, we are more likely to be treated the same way in return. People respond well to words spoken to them in a courteous tone, and do not like to be disparaged. Thus, when making a point to others in a tone that demonstrates high regard for them and in a manner that makes them feel valued, we get much further in life.

Thanks for taking the time to write. I hope the two stories I shared with you and my readers more clearly brings home the point that I was trying to make in the column two weeks ago. Hatzlachah!


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Dr. Yael Respler is a psychotherapist in private practice who provides marital, dating and family counseling. Dr. Respler also deals with problems relating to marital intimacy. Letters may be emailed to [email protected]. To schedule an appointment, please call 917-751-4887. Dr. Orit Respler-Herman, a child psychologist, co-authors this column and is now in private practice providing complete pychological evaluations as well as child and adolescent therapy. She can be reached at 917-679-1612. Previous columns can be viewed at www.jewishpress.com and archives of Dr. Respler’s radio shows can be found at www.dryaelrespler.com.