Dear Dr. Yael,
I was so moved by your column in this past week’s Jewish Press. It is so true that when one is in a position that requires helping others, we feel ashamed when we need the help. That has been the story of most of my life. I always worked in social services, and when I had to deal with many tragedies in my life, I felt that I had to be “SUPER WOMAN!” I though it was showing weakness to ask for help. So, I never asked for help and no one offered any. As a result, I became bitter and burned out. This lead to me to not caring for myself both physically and mentally. This was not productive at all and in fact, was very harmful. I was only hurting myself and my child. I had to seek treatment, which no one should ever be ashamed to do. I finally got the right type of help and was able to recover at my own pace.
Thank you Dr. Yael for writing in your wise column that it is alright to feel the pain of losing a loved one, or enduring any kind of loss. It is ok to need help and life is for giving and receiving.
May Hashem help you deal with your loss.
Gisele Strauch
Dear Gisele,
Thank you for sharing your story and for being brave enough to seek help as well as help others do the same. There is absolutely no shame in getting help when going through any type of difficult time or in getting help for anything you need. As someone who is used to giving, I understand how hard it is to be a taker, but Hashem gives us all different tests in life and we have to do our best to pass them. Thank you for your kind words and support and may Hashem grant you much nachas and good things from now on. Hatzlocha!
Dear Dr. Yael,
I read your letter about losing your husband. I was a patient of your husband. He was an amazing physician. He always made me feel good, even when he was doing procedures on me. I am really sorry for you and your family on the loss of Dr. Mark Respler. I enjoyed seeing your husband. He didn’t only care about me as a patient, he cared about me as a person. I have a son who needs a shidduch and he always tried to set him up. He was also interested in me and always made me feel cared about. Dr. Respler always cracked jokes to make me laugh, ensuring that my visits were always pleasant, despite whatever procedure I may have needed. Your husband had a great sense of humor. He was really funny. Sometimes when I went for my urological appointment I was not having a great day. However, after I left his office, I left in a good mood. I had a friend who had serious financial problems and no insurance, and your husband treated him for free. He was a real mensch. May he be a melitz yosher for your entire family.
Anonymous
Dear Anonymous,
Thank you for your beautiful letter. Your words are a balm to my soul and are very much appreciated. Hatzlocha!