Dear Dating Coach,
I went out with a really nice girl a couple of times and everything was going smoothly. But then my friend suggested a cousin of his who is only going to be in town for a few days. He really thinks we would be a good match and it would be seamless since she will be local. My older sister was there when we were discussing this and she said it would be wrong to go out with someone new while I am already dating another girl. We have only gone out a couple of times, and we barely know each other. I like her but I have no idea where this might go. What is the harm is going out with this new girl while I have the opportunity?
Still Available
Dear Available,
This has definitely happened to you. You innocently eat a piece of schnitzel (because, duh, schnitzel, it’s delicious) and then someone brings out a dairy dulce de leche, caramel topped, shiny donut and you start to negotiate the schnitzel away. How many hours has it been? (20 minutes.) My grandfather’s neighbor was a yekka. Or maybe his neighbor’s neighbor was one? I didn’t really enjoy the schnitzel fully. (I just ate the whole piece. Oh, and half of my son’s piece. Everyone knows that kid leftovers don’t count.) Schnitzel is not even meat! It’s chicken! I mean that donut just looks so good. But you ate meat and you can’t have it. Nope. You need to wait. End. Of. Story.
Donut Even Think About It.
This feels lucky. You are dating someone with promise and yet another great girl has been suggested for you at the same time. Shouldn’t we grab an opportunity?! When we have the potential for happiness, surely, we should exercise all our options! Yet, your sister doesn’t agree. She said it would be wrong to date a new girl, when you are currently seeing someone else, however new it might be. You think she is being shortsighted. The new girl is being delivered straight to your door! Recommended by someone you trust. Certainly, it makes sense to just see if you like her…
It is inappropriate to date two girls at once. This applies to any number of dates that have passed. It’s wrong and there is no way to change that. Give the girl you are dating currently the courtesy of your respect and full attention. She might be perfect for you. She might be the last girl you ever have to date. However, if it doesn’t work out, you can then revisit this other suggestion. Sure, she won’t be around the corner then, but a plane ride is a small price to pay to meet someone who might be right for you. So, regroup and focus on being the mentch that you are. Date with a whole heart and with full commitment. I think we all ate enough donuts for now anyway.
