Do you cry on Tisha B’Av?
I distinctly remember my mother sitting next to me at shul on Tisha B’Av. She was crying. As a teenager, I couldn’t understand what she was crying about. She told me she realized the source of all our pain was the destruction of the Beis HaMikdash.
Thousands of years removed from the original 9th of Av, you have to have a strong connection to Hashem and the significance of the churban to cry about it. But maybe my mother was onto something. Maybe you just have to realize that whatever pain you’re going through in your life right now is existentially rooted to an original pain: the removal of Hashem’s direct presence in the world through the destruction of the Temples. Your pain is the Jewish people’s pain and is Hashem’s pain. And vice versa.
I just heard a different perspective about crying on Tisha B’Av that I found revelatory. Sarah Rivkah Kohn, founder of Links Family, came onto my podcast, DMC, to discuss finding meaning in mourning. She explained that sometimes our pain is so encompassing that we find it hard to handle not only other people’s pain, but specifically days of mourning in the Jewish calendar. Tisha B’Av can be overwhelming for those whose plate is already full.
Many of us may find Tisha B’Av difficult to connect to or even uncomfortable to bear. And maybe that is reason enough to cry.
May Hashem give us no more reasons to cry and bring the Third Temple speedily in our days.