It wasn’t until about forty years ago that people became obsessed with their weight. They began to judge themselves and others based on the number they saw on the scale and whether they were good (with food), bad (with food) or cheated (with food).
To me this is the pinnacle of an unhealthy obsession, and frankly, it has no place in a religious environment. Why are we so focused on judging ourselves and others based on superficial, external values? Just like an additional layer of tznuis does not necessarily mean someone is more frum, so too, someone who is thin is just that, thin. Weight is only one indicator of overall health. There are plenty of people who are thin and extremely unhealthy, and plenty of those who are overweight but healthy.
Everyone has a weakness. For some people it is the inability to walk past a sales rack without dropping a few hundred dollars. For others, it’s the inability to keep their house organized.
Portion control is my struggle, as it is for many other women. It is a challenge that has caused me much anguish over the years, but now, in my thirties, I have allowed myself to say: “So what? Is this a reason to berate myself over and over again?”
We need to begin to accept ourselves for what we are, warts and all. People are created in all different shapes and sizes. Not everyone can be a size two, a six, or even a twelve. Just like alcoholics need to avoid alcohol for the rest of their lives and shopaholics must always use cash instead of credit cards, those of us who struggle with inappropriate eating habits will need to keep working on them.
And is that so terrible? I think it could be worse.
Let’s get off the diet train! We all know they don’t work. There is a reason that every month a new diet book is released, endorsed by all kinds of celebrities and hitting the bestseller list within a week: because the last diet we tried didn’t work. Let me break it gently to you: a new one won’t either.
Here is what will:
Eat less, Move More: That’s the only thing that works. No amount of trying to eat different combination of foods at different times in different positions will achieve anything greater than those four simple words.
Keep Trying: You know exactly what a healthy diet consists of: fresh fruits and vegetables, whole grains, lean proteins, plan- based fats, lots of water. Don’t give into temptation just because you ate a cookie or the scale didn’t budge that day. This is your life! If something is bothering you, don’t stop trying to fix it.
Food Was Created for Your Pleasure: Rav Noach Weinberg said that when he was growing up in the Lower East Side, his family was poor, barely getting by. However, his father, Rav Yitzchok, would always bring home a nice selection of exotic fruits for Shabbos. This was so that when he went up to heaven, he would be able to say that he indulged in all the pleasures God put into this world. The best way to take full advantage of the joy and pleasure food can provide you with is to take a plate, sit down, make a brocha, and enjoy your meal without any other distractions. If you are still in the mood to eat some more, wait till the next meal.
Be Realistic With Your Expectations: Don’t expect to eat healthy for one week and suddenly drop fifty pounds. It can take years to overcome unhealthy habits and progress can be slow. Just don’t give up! Be like the turtle in The Turtle and The Hare. You may move slowly, but as long as you keep moving, you will get there.