This yom tov we had several opportunities to say the Shechiyanu prayer, which translates into “that You – (referring to Hashem) let us live, and exist (sustained us) and let us reach this moment – brought us to this occasion, this reality.” We bless Hashem and express our deep thanks for the gift of being able to participate in a yom tov – which literally means “a good day.” Though we may recite this prayer individually – women do so as they light their holiday candles, the words are in the plural. Hence, we say “WE existed and lived and reached.” We Jews celebrate together – and unfortunately, mourn together for we are in “this together” – both the good, the bad and the ugly.
The words of Shechiyanu especially resonated with the Jewish people globally – in Israel and the Diaspora, with the long-awaited release of the hostages kidnapped by Hamas and imprisoned for two unbearably long years. Many hostages and their families uttered these words with total appreciation of their message – that we and they lived to witness and celebrate this moment in time.
We should be deeply mindful of the meaning of the Shechiyanu prayer every time we say it.
As an eight-year survivor of my third cancer – multiple myeloma (MM) which is the clinical name for bone marrow cancer, I totally appreciate the fact that Hashem has let me live, and has sustained me and let me come to this moment, enabling me to be present and to celebrate holidays, and family milestones like bar and bar mitzvahs, and even “ minor” events, like siddur parties, school plays and vacations. Being mindful of being able to do routine activities like getting out of bed, going to the bathroom and eating is something we all should appreciate and not take for granted. We should be grateful and cognitive every day and we should bless our Creator in our thoughts that He let us live. Every “normal” day is deserving of and warrants an unspoken Shechiyanu.
We recently bentched Rosh Chodesh – a prayer we say on the Shabbat before a new month begins. The prayer is poignant as we beseech G-d “to renew our lives in this new month, to grant us long life, a peaceful life with goodness and blessing, sustenance and helutz aztamot,” which literally translates to “strong bones.” It continues with a plea for a spiritual life, one infused with purity and piety, free from shame and a life of abundance and honor, with love of Torah.
I was puzzled by what I though was a redundancy – we ask for a long life, so why ask for strong bones? I realized that being blessed with many years of life, of a ripe old age – isn’t enough. One needs strong bones – physical well-being. I thought about children stricken with polio who were in iron lungs for decades, or young wounded soldiers who are paralyzed for the rest of their lives, or cancer patients whose bones have been eaten away by their cancers and though they might survive for decades, are invalids. Metastases – when cancer spreads – often spreads to the bones. Multiple myeloma affects the bones because the cancer is in the bone marrow. I have what is medically called lytic lesions from my skull down to my pelvis. But Hashem has been kind to me. These lesions, that often result in fractures in the spine, neck bones and vertebrae, have not affected my mobility or my ability to walk. I consider them as being like small dental cavities – they are there but don’t cause pain or disability.
I am sharing this with you because, while relatively rare, more people are being diagnosed with MM, and while it can be lethal, it doesn’t mean that is the way it will present itself. MM isn’t curable, but it is manageable, much like Type 1 diabetes is. Have strong “mental bones” if given a cancer diagnosis. Long term survival is more prevalent than it’s ever been. I believe Israeli researchers will come up with a cure sooner than later.
Speaking about Israel, I finally was able to travel there after my second stem cell transplant (my first was in 2018.) I have children and grandchildren there and I spent most of the chagim with them. I hope to finally make aliyah, a move that I had to postpone until my stem cells were put back in me – after being in the freezer for seven years until I needed them. I didn’t think the ElAl flight staff would believe me if I brought a bag of stem cells with me on an aliyah flight claiming it was home-made tomato soup!
A month in Israel after an 18-month absence – pre-transplant weekly injections for six months; 10 days in the hospital and then post-transplant recovery – my immune system isn’t quite there yet but good enough – has me coming to the realization that residing in galut is like living in black and white. Being in Israel is like living in glorious color. Imagine someone who is color-blind. They are totally functional, but they are missing out tremendously by not being able to color. I remember seeing a video of a man who was color-blind, trying on newly created high-tech glasses that allowed him to see color for the first time ever. His shock quickly turned into tears of joy – and sadness as he realized what he had missed all his life. Looking at flowers, he experienced orange, and yellow, and red, and purple and green.
Living in Israel is challenging on so many levels – but life-enhancing. You will experience a world of breathtaking color, being with family numbering in the millions – family that will be annoying, exasperating and drive you crazy at times – but who will always have your back and be there for you. And when you do land in Israel, Shechiyanu will always be in your thoughts.