Yes. There are not enough events to get older singles together. Shadchanim often don’t really get to know the people they are setting up, and family pressure to rush and marry actually causes many younger people to stay single longer. JDate is a good source for people to meet since it offers different age categories.
I feel it’s an exaggeration. There are more older singles now than before, but that’s simply because they haven’t found the right person yet. Not everyone is meant to marry at 18 or 19 and our community needs to be okay with that. It takes time to get to know someone, and shidduch dating doesn’t allow for the luxury of time. But the problem isn’t so much with the shidduch system as it is with the mindset of many people. Modern Jews are focused on searching for a type of person that may not exist.
Yes, there is a shidduch crisis. Singles, both women and men, don’t know what they want. Many girls are picky and are searching for that perfect Mr. Right. Men, too, are looking for an ideal and have unrealistic expectations. Another facet to this dilemma is that singles are looking at the high divorce rate and the statistics scare many of them from making a commitment.
Yes. The whole system is in crisis. People fear being single and this causes them to sometimes rush into marriage, only to be faced with divorce shortly afterward. There is a conflict and a lack of balance today with regard to traditionalism and modernism — many singles don’t know how to accommodate both when it comes to dating. Singles care too much about image, and the fear of failure and divorce can also sabotage their dating.
— Cheryl Cohen, secretary
