Life Chronicles

Dear Mrs. Bluth,

I am so upset right now; I just can't breathe! You can't imagine what a horrible thing is about to happen all because of something I said to my sister-in-law in the greatest confidence and she went and told my future machitenista what I said. I yelled at her why she did that and she said that the machitenista had a good sense of humor and would laugh about it! I screamed at her and said I never wanted to speak to her again.

Can you imagine what’s about to happen? The shidduch will probably be broken off, my daughter will never live it down or talk to me again. The machitanim will talk bad about us saying it was all our fault. All because of my big mouth.

I am sitting here weeping. In truth, was it such a terrible thing I said, that the future machitentista would be a beautiful woman if only she would see a dermatologist (she has peach fuzz on her upper lip and chin, otherwise she was stunning). Was that so terrible?! Now that I am sitting and writing to you it seems to me not to be so despicable or harsh, because I meant well and there were many more compliments than that one criticism. Maybe she will forgive me and think my sister-in-law was just trying to get into her good graces so she will confide in her. Does that sound realistic? My sister-in-law swore to me she didn't tell this to anyone else and that it just accidentally fell out of her mouth at the kiddush in shul on Shabbos as they are neighbors living three houses apart and my sister-in-law made the shidduch between my daughter and the machitentista’s son!

OK, so now I'm just a tiny bit calmer, but I still need to know if I need to do something more to rectify the situation. Please tell me if I should call my machitentista and further apologize for my words or something else. You give such good advice, and I know that you will be able to tell me how to fix this.

Sign me,

SOS

Dear Friend,

Every so often, I get a letter such as yours that makes me question the validity of the letter-writer and this week you won that spot. However, I never like to pass up an opportunity to bring to the attention of my readership how often we create our own problems! The one saving grace in this whole mess is that I know your sister-in-law personally and I believe she would never say anything or pass on anything hurtful to anyone else. So, I called her just to make sure and she assured me I had nothing to worry about. The machitentista loves your daughter and can't wait for her son to marry her and turn her into her daughter-in-law. I also got her blessing to print this letter and turn it into a reminder that "LOOSE LIPS SINK SHIPS" is not just a silly observation, because that is precisely what lashon hara is!

Consider yourself extremely lucky this time and watch the words that come out of YOUR mouth into someone else's ears. Call your sister-in-law and thank her for bailing you out and keeping your secret, and mazal tov! May the wedding go off without a hitch!