Death of a Matriarch

Vayishlach

The Torah is very "ceremonious" when it describes the deaths of the Avot, the Patriarchs. Of the three, the passing of Yaakov was undoubtedly the most ceremonious. It contains an elaborate description the "embalming," the "state funeral," the order in which his sons surrounded and carried his coffin.

This is not the case with the Imahot, the Matriarchs.

The only Imahot who died "ceremoniously" were Sarah and to some extent Rachel. The Torah says how old Sarah was when she died (127), where she died and goes on to describe the episode surrounding her burial in Me'arat HaMachpeila. With Rachel the Torah does not even say how old she was when she died (36), only where she is buried.

With Rivka and Leah, the Torah does not even mention their deaths, when they died, or at what age (Rivka 122, Leah 45). The Torah only tells us in a "by the way" reference, that they are buried in Me'arat HaMachpeila (Bereishit 49:31). With Bilha and Zilpa nothing is said at all in the Torah about their deaths and where they were buried. According to one opinion they are buried in the Kever Imahot in Teveria.

The glaring question is – "Why is there different treatment in the Torah for the Imahot and the Avot, in relation to their deaths? Surely all the Imahot deserve the same honorable obituaries in the Torah when they died, as did the Avot?

The reason I am discussing this topic here, is because, according to Chazal, Rivka's death is mentioned (indirectly) in this week's parsha.

The Mefarshim ask why it was necessary to mention the death of Devorah, Rivka's wet nurse (Bereishit 35:9)?

Firstly, who was Devorah? According to Chizkuni, she was Rivka's wet nurse and when Eliezer returned with Rivka, Yitzchak's future wife, Devorah also accompanied them. According to the Targum Yonatan she was Rivka's teacher, who raised her. It is possible that she was both.

Rashi and the Ramban, quoting the Midrash, tell us that Devorah was not the main focus of this pasuk. Yes, Devorah died, but more importantly the death that the Torah is hinting at was Rivka's, that Rivka and Devorah died at the same time.

According to Rashi, quoting the Midrash, the reason that the pasuk omits any mention of Rivka's death was to not embarrass her, to prevent people cursing her because she gave birth to Eisav. However, the Ramban does not agree with this. The Ramban says that if this was the case, then why does the pasuk (ibid. 29), referring to Yitzchak's death, mention that he was buried by both Eisav and Yaakov? If mention of Eisav at all causes people to curse those who gave birth to him, then why is he mentioned as burying Yitzchak?

The Ramban goes on to explain the difference between the burial of Rivka and Yitzchak. Yitzchak could not attend Rivka's funeral because he was blind and housebound. Yaakov had not yet returned home. Rivka did not want Eisav to bury her, since Eisav hated her. Therefore, before she died, she instructed the sons of Chet to bury her in Me'arat HaMachpeila during the night, before Eisav would have a chance to commandeer the funeral the following day. According to the Ramban, this is why the Torah only hints to Rivka's death and does not mention it explicitly, to save her the embarrassment of the circumstances surrounding her funeral.

Later, when Yitzchak died, both Eisav and Yaakov were there, and since Yaakov was present, it was not an embarrassment to mention Eisav.

The Ramban continues that after Rivka married Yitzchak, Devorah returned to the house of Betuel and Lavan. When Yaakov was living with Lavan for 20 years, it was Devorah who helped raise and teach Yaakov's children, in Rivka's honor.

The Malbim gives a different explanation, that Devorah remained with Rivka as long as she was alive, but after Rivka died, Devorah could no longer tolerate the evil of Eisav and his wives and left to meet Yaakov and died soon after.

Rivka and Devorah's souls were connected and when Rivka died, so too did Devorah. Yaakov buried her under an oak tree which he named Alon Bachut, the "weeping oak." Tosafot says that this is the same tree under which the prophetess Devorah later sat (Judges 4:5).

The question remains, why there seems to be different treatment for the deaths of the Avot and the Imahot in the Torah?

There is a noticeable difference in the purpose and destinies of the Avot and the Imahot. The Avot are more "universal" and the Imahot are more focused specifically on "giving birth" to the Twelve Tribes, to Am Yisrael. For this reason, the work of the Avot is primarily "out of the tent" – digging wells, welcoming guests, converting converts, rescuing Lot to ensure the Mashiach lineage for all mankind, etc. The work of the Imahot is primarily "in the tent" making sure the "correct" son becomes the heir.

With the Avot, the "universal" nature of their destiny requires the Torah to visibly specify certain details, like the dates and circumstances of their deaths, to emphasize the message "This is the Torah and this is its reward." HaKadosh Baruch Hu promised certain promises to the Avot and these promises must be seen to have been kept, universally – to all the world.

With the Imahot, it is not the same thing. HaKadosh Baruch Hu’s promises to the Imahot revolve around their children. This is not a universal message to the entire world, this is an internal, "in the tent" message for the Imahot. Excepting for Sarah and Rachel, the deaths of the other Imahot had no universal significance, they were an internal matter. The deaths of Sarah and Rachel did have universal significance and for this reason they are the only Imahot for whom we know their yahrzeit (Sarah – 1 Tishrei, Rachel – 11 Cheshvan). The death of Sarah is a universal matter involving the entire world – establishing the ownership of Me'arat HaMachpeila by Sarah's descendants, so that the rest of the world can never dispute it. The death of Rachel similarly has a universal ramification – to comfort Am Yisrael exiled to Bavel and decree their future redemption. It is a universal message to the entire world "It does not matter how you try to persecute Am Yisrael, in the end they will triumph and inherit the earth!"

Parshat HaShavua Trivia Question: Did Reuven sleep with Bilhah?

Answer to Last Shiur’s Trivia Question: Who did Rivka go to consult with when she felt her twin fetuses "running about" inside her? With Shem, the rosh yeshiva of Yeshivat Shem ve'Ever.