So Totally Sick Of School: Depicting Life As A First Year Law Student

I hear my alarm clock buzzing But my body refuses to budge It needs another shot of caffeine In the form of a latte with mocha-fudge

But it can’t allow itself that indulgence Because then that time will be eaten away Leaving me with yet another 15 fewer In the count of minutes to my day

So I’ll fight the urge back Get right back on the track For I know the dreaded rule I’ve still gotta cram In prep for the next exam I’m so totally sick of school.

This is law school, so I prepare Study till my brain turns to gel This is law school, so I better not slack Because it’s death if one doesn’t do well

I’m told if you're not in the top 10 You'll be looked at by all as a jerk You'll be pitied by every employer And, of course, you'll never find work

You'll watch your friends slave away in a firm While you're left working 9-5 Or be so miserably waiting tables You might wish you weren't alive

So might as well get used to this quite early This lifestyle that seems rather cruel Got to become a nice sweet workaholic Despite being totally sick of school

I’ve got an hour of reading for torts And a memorandum to write There's no chance in the world I can hope to catch A glimpse of sleep tonight

Got a midterm coming this friday Plan to read 3 cases ahead How I’m yearning to rekindle the relationship I once had with my pillow and bed

I’ll grab a sandwich instead of a salad, For that's easier to wolf-down Pick the nearest market to go to I don't have the time now to stroll around town

At noon there’s no time to take a walk In a park that’s beautiful or serene I have an interview for an externship And have to meet with the dean

At least there’s a bright-looking future They say the start of work life is all the worse Though you acquire a bad vocabulary in law school, That’s when you really begin to curse!

So I better get used to prison-full rote Better get used to this gruel Better get used to composing each memorandum and note And get so much more sick of school

I sit looking outside my window Wondering if there's life beside Full of laughter, and joy, and fun stuff A world where happiness trumps people’s job pride

But not for me, no way no how Not for us students, at least for now

Cuz they’ll laugh at me, and mock me If I begin to complain or shed a tear Call me a wimp for asking the question What am I doing or why am I here?

They’ll ask me: Why'd we struggle to take the lsat What about the tuition that you chose to pay? I guess misery loves company What else can I possibly say?

They’ll tell me, if you drop out, perhaps you'll have a life But you'll be a loser in the law And that’s something to avoid, at every cost For it’s the world's most fatalist flaw

So get ready…get set…get briefing For you need not be a fool Take a hornbook or easy outline Even if you’re totally sick of school

It's already 6PM, and there's so much to get done Got to get my eyes glossing over hundreds of pages While getting ready to start reading a ton

Have my fingers aright and lap-top ready While keeping my brain super-sharp Keep the world's musings beside me Let them go, just let them harp

Start with products liability theory Continue till concepts in my brain start to swim I'll have to shove more info into my cerebrum For the job market’s looking rather grim

And I guess I better finish this poem now Or it will contain too many a rhyme And then I won't get very much done While still keeping track of the time

Wish I could go back to my older-self The one that thought lawyering is cool And snap in some sense, prior to becoming so tense And so totally sick of school