יום שלישי, כ״ב תמוז תשפ״וTuesday, July 7, 2026
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An acclaimed educator and social skills specialist, Mrs. Rifka Schonfeld has served the Jewish community for close to thirty years. She founded and directs the widely acclaimed educational program, SOS, servicing all grade levels in secular as well as Hebrew studies. A kriah and reading specialist, she has given dynamic workshops and has set up reading labs in many schools. In addition, she offers evaluations G.E.D. preparation, social skills training and shidduch coaching, focusing on building self-esteem and self-awareness. She can be reached at 718-382-5437 or at rifkaschonfeld@gmail.com.
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As I delved deeper into these findings, joy started to become less amorphous and abstract to me and more tangible and real.
Suppression and avoidance might seem to be the easiest answers. “Let’s go back to checking our emotions at the door.” But this attitude is counterproductive.
If the key to good meetings or gatherings is purpose, how to do we figure out if we have one?
Research shows that girls and boys brains develop in different sequences.
For adults, this twelve-step guide can certainly be helpful in building new pathways in the brain to create resilience. But, what can you do for children?
With the passing of time people begin to look back on previous years and feel dissatisfaction (even if this is completely subjective and someone on the outside would think that they were doing great).
The assumption was that children with Down Syndrome are globally delayed, but what Professor Buckley recognized is that these children have a particular profile of learning delays and relative strengths.
It is important that your child not feel ashamed. He should understand that it is something you will work with him to overcome.
It’s easy to “misdiagnose” this condition and call it laziness, but that would be a terrible shame.
Is it any wonder that so many children do not measure up to the heavy expectations placed on their young shoulders?
All children, especially those with ADHD, crave routine.
Not only do children who read proficiently have an easier time in all academic areas, they also are more capable in social situations.
If she has required summer reading, be sure to balance the books she is interested in with those on the list.
Behavioral issues come into play, frequently turning twice exceptional children into “problem students” – even as they are head and shoulders above the crowd intellectually.
For those who are introverted, being with people often feels like it is sapping their energy – even if they themselves have great social skills.
Many doctors and psychologists describe this anger as an integral part of growing up.
Often, teenagers need to see beyond their own lives; doing community services is a great way to broaden their horizons and do some good!
Many of the characteristics you describe: repetitive physical behaviors (blinking or closing his eyes), social isolation, and violence against himself and others are symptomatic of autism.
Whatever the numbers, anxiety and depression in a person of any age are conditions too serious to ignore.
Many schools and professionals have only one method or set of methods for remedying reading or language problems. Students who don't fit that profile exasperate those who are working with them.
What easier method to ensure that they are really studying their brochos than by sponsoring a schoolwide brochos contest with much fanfare?
Deep down Chaim is miserable and his parents are at their wits’ end.
In truth, we all try hard to be absolutely honest. We even point out a mistake in our favor to the cashier checking out our groceries.
“Is there something I can do to make my kids smarter?” Some parents are surprised to hear my answer, “Yes, yes, and yes!
In his clinical experience, Wineman has found that teaching children to express themselves verbally can forestall pent-up frustration that leads to anger
Many important life skills are developed when a child has a special interest, and not all of them are directly related to the interest itself.
In my office, I often deal with parents asking for advice on how to handle the difficult challenges of adolescence and the teen years.
What is Selective Mutism? It is a child suffering in silence.
Arrange for optimal work conditions. Kids need to work in a quiet environment, one that is relatively distraction-free.
According to experts, the first ten seconds of an interview are the most crucial, as that is when the interviewer sizes up potential candidate.
Ultimately, the stakes will be raised even higher as the insatiable child learns he can hold his parents hostage with bad behavior until he wheedles out of them just about everything he wants.
People who have OCD have a hard time making decisions, even relatively simple ones, such as what to eat for lunch and what shirt to wear to work, fearing that a wrong choice could end up having disastrous consequences for themselves or others.
A responsible person not only behaves a certain way, he also admits errors, accepts blame, and does whatever he can to repair the damage.
Parents who fall into the “hurried trap” respond immediately to their children’s requests and desires. This means that when they are forced to wait it causes anxiety and uncertainty.
A mini habit is basically a much smaller version of a new habit you want to form.
By some counts, roughly thirty percent of people fall into the introverted temperament end of the spectrum.
Dr. Meeker argues that a mother’s real value comes from three places: she is loved, she is needed, and she is born for a higher purpose.
For children who are preschool age, meltdowns will generally occur around food, clothing, and toys.
Without something familiar or exciting to hold on to, they boys will lose interest.
Ask your daughter what the cause of her anxiety is – social, academic, or separation from you.
If things are falling into place in school because of remediation, what can you do at home in order to make things easier in your own household?
Okay, so stubbornness brings lots of benefits, but what about the negative consequences when raising a child?
But, what happens if you can’t get away? There are some ways to help your body relax even in the confines of your own home.
Q: I just had my first baby and my parents and grandparents keep telling me that I will spoil her if I hold her too much or don’t let her cry. I definitely don’t want to have a spoiled child, but is it possible to spoil a baby by holding her too much? Will she […]
In addition, if your younger child complains of headaches or stomachaches a lot, especially when he has been home after school with his brother, this could be a symptom of bullying.
Social phobias are characterized not only by nervousness when in social situations or when forced to give a presentation or speech, but also by a powerful desire to avoid most situations that involve interacting with others.
Children who have friends in the classroom and are comfortable with their peers are more likely to participate, volunteer, and speak up.
Depending on your son’s age, he may not be able to comprehend the importance of these benefits.
Q: My nineteen-year-old daughter was set up on a date a little while ago. We spoke to many of his references, all of whom told us how wonderful he and his family were. They have gone out a number of times and my daughter seems to be very interested in him. However, I have noticed […]
On a much more serious note, Judaism prescribes many rules that we follow that involve both moral and religious codes.
How many times do we dismiss our children’s accomplishments without giving them the praise they deserve?
I wondered how his life may have been different if he had more direction, more encouragement, and more self-compassion.
He argues that all humans have “common needs” – around thirty of them.
Rising strong after a fall is how we cultivate wholeheartedness in our lives; it’s the process that teaches us the most about who we are.
Just like your arm muscles need sleep to recharge and rest, your willpower needs the same.
How can we teach our children that learning can and should take place outside of the classroom in addition to in the classroom?
Exercise may also boost feel-good endorphins, release muscle tension, help you sleep better, and reduce levels of the stress hormone cortisol.
For many people, bad habits fill specific needs. For instance, nail biting relieves anxiety and procrastination simulates relaxation.
It’s very possible that you are disorganized because you simply have never tried to be organized. However, there is also the possibility that you are disorganized because you are missing executive function skills.
If NVLD is misunderstood, children can develop more serious emotional problems such as depression, anxiety, and phobias.
"I've collected that data all along, and what I've learned about surviving hurt has saved me again and again. It saved me and, in the process, it changed me.”
Get to know the employer. If you learn about the company or the person who will employ you, you will be showing a sincere interest in the job.
When still in school, it’s easier to make friends because you are forced into social situations. As an adult, making friends can be harder – especially because your life is busy.
We all have physical needs, we all have relational needs, and we all have aspirational or spiritual needs. When we understand that about each other, we can easily understand each other.
There are, however, some ways that you can help your daughter gain confidence and have an easier time making friends.
A good to-do list will show the day’s top priorities based on importance and urgency.
We can all use the science of likability to master charisma, attract friends, and cultivate people.
What might be making your daughter so quiet in the classroom? It is possible that your daughter suffers from selective mutism.
Keep in mind that isolated symptoms are not an indication of dyslexia. Rather, it is only manifest when three or four symptoms consistently appear as a part of a pattern.
In reality, separation anxiety can manifest itself at almost any age during childhood, especially during times of stress.
This conduct is even part of the normal development of toddlers and early adolescents.
It’s hard for parents to identify when their child is acting as a bully if they are not present for the behavior.
I have started wondering – which fears are normal and which are not? Is there a way to alleviate irrational fears?
Right now, I am at a loss. How can I help Leah be more comfortable and set those around her at ease? Otherwise, I’m worried that she will miss out on meeting her bashert!
In other words, by allowing your children to experience disappointment, you are teaching them how to cope with frustration in the future.
The reality of the situation is that if your child is asking you for help that means that he has not figured out a way to master the situation on his own.
It breaks my heart to see my once happy and confident daughter depressed and isolated from her peers.
So, what’s affecting us today? Sapolsky argues that our heart disease, adult-onset diabetes, Alzeheimers, and even cancer might be caused by stress.
The point is that we can’t behave right when we don’t feel right. And kids can’t behave right when they don’t feel right.
We often think of technology as the barrier to mindfulness. Gunatillake argues that we need using technology as a tool for mindfulness can actually be helpful, rather than harmful.
“We know from human history and the latest learning science that success comes from the combination of academic knowledge and the ability to work with others…” – Walter Isaacson The Social Skills – Academics Connection There’s a lot of research on the connection between social skills and academic success. In a report in the […]
It is important to set high expectations, but they should be tied to effort and not results. Therefore, as a parent, you should always praise effort, and never praise results.
As the director of SOS (Strategies of Optimal Success), I see children, teenagers, and adults struggling with bully issues.
Think about a really successful person. Do you think this person achieved his or her success with little or no effort?
Provide opportunities for chesed. Get your children out there, helping those less fortunate or those in need.
Every quest has a beginning, and sooner or later, every quest will come to an end.
Even adults need memory strategies to remember important details in their personal or work lives.
The problem-solving needs to be collaborative. Rather than working for the one person with the challenging behavior, you might work with the person.
In this book, Brown points out that those who feel like they truly belong have the courage to stand alone.
A final way to build self-esteem in your children and your family is simply to tell each other when you enjoy each other’s company.
Introverts are people who prefer to be alone, enjoying the lack of stimulation and noise. On the other hand, extroverts thrive off of other people’s conversation and energy.
Why does it sometimes feel as if we spend most of our professional lives fixing problems rather than enhancing and improving?
Sometimes, you just have to dive in, otherwise you will never make it.
The more results you can contribute, the more people will trust you and want to work with you and for you.
What should you have in your life’s backpack? What skills are essential for you to live your best life?
Through your courage in sharing and your friend’s compassion, you have created a powerful connection to somebody outside of your shame.
Kids with NVLD are very verbal and often do not have academic problems until they get to the upper grades in school.
How much of yourself can you reveal to your friends? How much do you hide because you fear rejection?
In order to see ourselves positively, we inflate our egos and look down on others. And, in our society, we also beat ourselves up when we don’t feel special.
As with most problems in her life, Sandberg approached this one logically. She asked her esteemed friends who are world renowned psychologists and professors for a plan.
July 3, 2026 
