יום רביעי, כ״ז אלול תשפ״וWednesday, September 9, 2026
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We all start life the same way – as babies completely dependent on others for even our most basic needs... The older we become, however, the more control we gain. We learn to communicate, move, and interact with others.
While I do agree that the wife and husband should appreciate each other, and constantly praise and validate each other, perhaps it is also unwise to share this praise with their parents.
Perhaps, we are getting closer to the other side and you can’t help but envision a guest-filled wedding day in the location you have always wanted.
Though you might not like to admit it – there is a chance that your child’s stubbornness is genetic.
You have taken the time to learn, to grow, and to make positive inroads in your life. You feel transformed and that makes you want to shed your past and what is represented. Yet, you are still you.
After a significant event, my family went through a very challenging time. Despite it all, my father remained strong and resilient in the face of adversity.
Creating schedules and setting timers can help those with ADHD harness their natural energy and direct it towards their passion.
It is time to move on. What he hopes for or wants at this point is not your concern and only time will tell for him.
My nutritionist has taught me this invaluable lesson and for the first time in my life, I am not on a diet, but rather I am living a healthy, balanced lifestyle that includes all food groups.
Well, Nachi, if you don’t know how to put your shoes on, then we won’t be able to go to your friend’s birthday party. We can’t go outside without shoes on.
When we dress up for our date, we are conveying our care and interest in the outcome.
Comparing yourself to others is a very dangerous thing. It never helps you feel better and often is based on false premises.
Girls use relationships to bully each other. This starts as early as preschool, when a girl realizes the supremacy of “I won’t be your friend anymore.”
Why would someone want to marry me? Why would they take their chances with a girl who has all this baggage when there are so many others around who are more eligible?
You are certainly no dummy. Clever is the name of your game. Reaching out for help is always the right thing to do.
Using your successful relationship with your parents as a guide, you will be better equipped to maintain long-term relationships in the future.
What did she have children for if not to personally and lovingly raise her precious jewels?
You are two individuals, and having varied interests should not only be expected, but can be encouraged.
Out of nowhere, Ruti would feel herself growing annoyed without even understanding why she was upset.
It is always a blessing to find someone that you connect with. But in the often-complicated world of shidduchim, your psyche has thrown a wrench at your potential future together.
One important thing I have learned through making my own mistakes was to not approach single individuals at simchas or coming out of shul.
Helping divorced couples remarry may seem unorthodox, but I have actually been involved in such cases and have, with siyatta d'Shmaya, helped divorced couples, who wanted to reconcile, remarry each other successfully.
Second guessing your decision when it comes to shidduchim is so difficult where clarity is the greatest gift you can ask for.
Pay attention to what your daughter is learning in school. Are women represented? See if there is a way to incorporate more positive role models.
It takes a certain sensitivity to do marital therapy. The therapist should try to put themselves in the client’s shoes and try to be careful not to open up issues that the couple will have to live with later and not have the tools to deal with.
It can be hard to adjust and pivot in order to arrange a date, especially with someone who lives out of state.
Just this past week two families related that they had been contemplating the purchase of a medical alert device but had pushed off the process... until one of their family members fell at home and spent the entire night on the floor alone, unable to call for help.
Your letter was difficult to read. I hear your frustration so clearly in every word you wrote and how baffled you are by something that seems so clear to you.
You might wonder why someone in my field is writing about this topic. The truth is that we have all seen that isolation is rampant and a secondary symptom of this pandemic.
Seasonal affective disorder, also known as winter depression, is a real thing. It is a type of depressive disorder that only tends to surface during the winter months.
Sure, she has been the bright and shiny option for so long, giving you the ability to remain in the shadows. But she never put you in the background, you allowed yourself to be placed there.
It is human nature to look forward to a milestone, to say, “by next Pesach, we will be back to normal and celebrating together.” The problem with that is when next Pesach comes and things remain the same, you will feel crestfallen and distraught.
Ultimately, that high that your wife gets from shopping will not last long term, as stuff will not make her happy.
The only way to build trust is to share. This is scary because it makes us vulnerable. When we share with someone, we are hoping that they will safeguard our secrets and never use them to hurt us.
While those who suffer from SAD syndrome generally begin to feel the effects once we change the clock and the days get shorter, these symptoms have been intensified by Covid-19 and the way that the pandemic has changed our life.
Keeping communication open is very important. This is crucial for all children, so you can detect any issues or problems early on.
It is perfectly normal to have a specific vision for your future and can even be helpful in helping you to achieve and grow. Presumably however, you have dated people with these criteria and have not yet found the person for you.
Some of the anxiety associated with math comes from the need to be perfect, to always get the right answer.
Dr. Yael’s answer to this unfortunate mother was that she felt sorry for “what happened to you and to your family.”
Some daters and couples simply need more time because more often than not, both parties don’t develop a connection at the exact same rate.
How can you notice this imbalance in your children? Pay attention to the way they speak.
No one should ever feel inferior because they needed to use medication to help them overcome their depression, anxiety, or any other emotional difficulties.
The only thing that meal planning does not account for is “the toddler.” The toddler you see, always holds that one card that can’t be contested...
Your friends are seemingly dating with excitement and you don’t share their enthusiasm for a future that you are not ready for.
Both instilling motivation and creating a safe space are integral parts of learning, helping students feel that they both want to learn and that the conditions are right for learning.
I am so sorry about what happened to you and to your family. Please don’t feel guilty. You had no idea this would happen.
Yes, your daughter may be moody, but she needs positive attention and love, not negativity.
Your sister and her clear thrill at being engaged satisfied your friends and family while your calm demeanor worries them and now you; begging the question, “Do I feel enough?”
Improving our social thinking begins with improving self-awareness, and is a skill that is used for much more than having successful social interactions.
Using imagery with deep breathing usually makes the techniques more effective and generally helps people maintain their focus better.
Unfortunately, doing the right thing doesn’t always feel good. The pain after self-sacrifice can feel extremely hurtful as you are already putting aside your own singular happiness.
Whether your child is at home or in school learning, incorporate brain breaks – time for movement that can actually jump start the brain.
The fact that she has been diagnosed and is taking medication can be a positive thing as it may show that she is someone who takes care of issues and overcomes challenges.
The hothead gets angry because “nobody else knows how to drive!” and loses control when accidents happen (ie. a spilled drink).
In addition to the challenge of making lessons interesting, it’s difficult for teachers to gage the progress of students.
We always hear from well meaning people to read Dr. Gerber and to FERBERIZE him, but this method just doesn’t seem appropriate for us.
What’s the problem with our decision-making process? How can we deal with it even in this most stressful times?
To the single, it will forever place ‘single status’ blame on their shoulders alone, without any regard for the myriad of circumstances that may attribute to why someone is still not married at a certain age.
Don’t get stuck on the “who” of the feedback. Instead, focus on the “what.”
You believe you are all interchangeable at best and at worst the least shiny penny in a pocketful of change.
Remind the children (and their parents) that we only eat at the table at Bubby’s house. If you keep saying this (if needed) in a calm and happy voice, the kids will likely comply and not take any offense.
For those who have lost their regular routines, who go to sleep and wake up with uncertainty of what tomorrow will bring, it is likely that they are experiencing anxiety.
When a person has a secure attachment style, they feel confident in their relationship and in their partner.
Often, the well-meaning suggestions offered at home by siblings and parents on whom you should be dating, and how you should be dating, only cause the single sibling pain and anxiety.
As soon as we wake up, we are (hopefully) motivated to join the world.
None of these girls are the “same type” yet going to their seminary branded them as a certain “type.” Had their respective husbands not gone out with them because of the schools they went to, they would’ve never married their bashert.
Dating can be hard and it can be disheartening. This is especially true for those that have dated for a long time.
What about emotional and mental health issues? How do we get to the root of those? There are diagnostics, tests, and surveys to help diagnose emotional or mental issues. But, we all know that there are times that we get it wrong.
This probably is not indicative of a larger issue, but either way, it is not your place to address it.
Without the option to have been a fly on the wall during your dates, it is impossible for anyone to completely determine if it was too fast, too slow, or just enough.
Explain to your daughter that you want to do whatever it takes to rebuild your relationship. Ask her what you can do differently to repair your relationship.
While you certainly know one another now, time will only encourage the ease and comfort that you feel with one another, making your spouse someone that you appreciate spending so much time with.
They went through the same process every year: Moshe kicking and screaming in the car on the way to school, two months of crying before he went to sleep, and then Moshe’s eventual resignation and despair for the duration of the year.
It is not easy to deal with negative people, but if this is important to your husband, you may need to try to have your father-in-law over and make the best of it.
You never want someone to feel compelled to marry you because a certain number of dates have passed and he feels bad, or to move toward marriage if he does not feel thrilled to be doing so.
My husband has been driving me crazy to lose weight and even blaming me for the hard time our daughter is having getting dates.
This year, with most camps closed and several months with no school, siblings have already spent lots of time together. This can make the conflict even more pronounced.
September 4, 2026 
