יום שלישי, י״א תשרי תשפ״זTuesday, September 22, 2026
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Stubbornness brings lots of benefits, but what about the negative consequences when raising a child? Is there a way to alleviate them?
Being a people-pleaser is not necessarily a bad thing, but it becomes difficult when you feel you have to avoid conflict at all costs.
Your child is always watching you, even if you don’t notice. If you model gratitude, by saying “thank you” to the clerk in the grocery store and the car service driver, you are teaching him the proper way to act.
Women are generally more sensitive and astute and the fact that you seem happier and more vibrant may be upsetting to your daughters. Perhaps, they were Daddy's girls, so this is hard for them to see.
In the beginning, perhaps you appreciated the input and research your parents offered, but now things have changed. You are less reliant on their suggestions and opinions and trust yourself to make good dating choices.
Changing your children’s negative behavior will probably require you to change yourself.
Maybe it was true! Maybe they only loved me because of all the joy that I give them. Maybe they don't really love me for myself!
While marriage is holy and beautiful, it is also a huge responsibility. It is a parents’ duty to make sure that their child is physically, emotionally, and mentally prepared for this lifetime commitment.
How is character built? According to Tough, character is created by encountering and overcoming failure.
It is best to make lifestyle changes and seek guidance from health care practitioners on how to deal with the weight issues in your life and your family's life.
I’m sure you are a wonderful guy, and clearly, you are not to blame for the uneven balance of our dating system where girls seem to be the underdogs. You want to date right, but there is a limit on the excitement you can conjure when every date feels so similar.
Parents of younger children can play matching games which will help with making connections. Parents of older children can talk about math when in the supermarket or famous artists when drawing at home.
If earworms are causing you significant distress it is important to seek professional help. This could be a sign of underlying anxiety or Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD).
More likely, the shadchanim and your family and friends are making valuable suggestions that your ego refuses to consider.
Unexpressed anger can lead to other problems, such as feeling perpetually hostile and cynical.
We all deal with anger once in a while. But, during the teenage years, anger is something that can take over both teenagers’ and parents’ lives. This anger can feed that bad wolf and make him grow out of proportion.
If you want happiness for an hour, take a nap. If you want happiness for a day, go fishing, if you want happiness for a year, inherit a fortune, if you want happiness for a lifetime, help somebody.
We forget to look in the mirror to acknowledge our beauty and successes, and instead, open every window to let in our failures and disappointments.
ear is part of our survival instincts. When we are faced with danger, our body goes into what scientists call fight or flight mode.
Keeping a journal has also been found to be helpful in remediating homesickness. When writing, it’s important that your daughter focus on the positive and all of the fun that she is experiencing.
If your parents are not the right resource right now, find someone who is. This can be a Rebbetzin, an aunt, a close family friend, or a therapist. It’s true that many kallahs feel nervous after getting engaged and it is possible that you are simply one of them.
Who doesn’t love to procrastinate? It’s much easier to do something fun than to sit down and do what you’ve got to do. But establishing what our priorities are can then help us fight that procrastination and accomplish our goals.
Prioritizing other people‘s needs can lead to burn out and neglecting your own emotional and physical well-being.
We tell ourselves every day that mistakes define us and shape us and in turn they hold us back from improvement and change. But what if you ate the cake, enjoyed it, but ultimately decided that it was not in your best interest?
While remediation focuses on the past, acceleration focuses on the present. What are the students learning this week?
Dedicating small mitzvos you do in your father’s memory can also be helpful. It doesn't have to be large things. Every mitzvah can be something special for your father.
Perhaps, you feel closer on one date and less so on another. This is common, and patience and some encouragement can be all that we need. That being said, when we actively notice that we like someone less and less as we date, we need to recognize and take note.
For those who are introverted, being with people often feels like it is sapping their energy – even if they themselves have great social skills. Because of this perceived depletion of energy, after a party or meeting, they will need time alone in order to recharge.
Some people may think it is cruel to not marry a boy because of their family background, but be forewarned: even if he is remorseful about the way he treats his mother, he will most certainly repeat it with you.
It is so exciting that you have met someone that you are contemplating a future with. But with Pesach and the spotlight on minhagim and customs, you now see your differences in a new light. You worry that this will be an adjustment you might never be ready for and may be too much to take on.
Pesach is a time of freedom – not just from physical bondage but also from limitations that hold us back. Just as Bnei Yisrael prepared for their journey from Mitzrayim by refining themselves, we too can use this time for self-improvement.
You are likely having anxious thoughts. These thoughts are probably swimming around your mind all day and are exacerbating your anxious feelings. Once you identify your anxious thoughts, you will need to reframe them and create more logical, non-anxious thoughts, which you will use to start getting your anxiety under control.
Dear Dating Coach, I am not going home for Pesach. Nothing you say will convince me to change my mind. I am dating someone pretty new in the city that I am currently living in and I want to continue dating him over Pesach. My family lives quite a distance away. So, I have […]
It is crucial that the couple should not leave the session in a state of anger. Instead, it is best to focus on positive things in the marriage and work on the deeper, more problematic issues separately.
Your inability to see past a picture, a number (both height and weight!) your impudence over color preference, and your arrogance in creating a Ken doll just for you, will leave you not only without a date, or mate, but a future based on Torah values.
It’s true that your daughter might have trouble relating to children her own age, but as she gets older, she will be comfortable in all sorts of situations. Once she enters high school, her peers will have caught up with her and she will do equally well at interacting with her classmates as well as adults.
It is very hard to help someone who hoards. People who hoard may not realize that their behavior is potentially unhealthy or dangerous or they may know but feel uncomfortable speaking about it with others.
You like him. You really do. You have had a great time together. You connected. Your parents did extensive research. They know he has qualities that they felt made him worthy of you. You have spent time together. Now, trust yourself. Trust the process.
What is separation anxiety? Most people think that separation anxiety is something our six-month-old infants develop and our toddlers grow out of. Separation anxiety before a child is two years old is completely normal and helps children learn how to master their environment.
Of course organization and being prepared will lower your anxiety, but what is just as important is teaching your brain that Pesach cleaning does not have to be anxiety provoking.
There is an art to communication, where you truly listen, absorb and then discuss what you have heard. You cannot leave or walk out when you don’t like the discussion.
Psychologists and educators agree on one point; the single most important criterion in raising truthful children is to expose them consistently to a home and school environment where integrity is not only preached but scrupulously practiced. Even when it involves sacrifice.
I am not sure what your financial situation is, but it may be a good idea to get some professional help to aid your wife in her situation.
Take the time to self-reflect on your growth and sense of responsibility. Are you capable, emotionally stable, and grounded? Assess your ability to navigate the world around you, to stay the course during challenges, and to take care of yourself. If you feel like you have those in the bag, you are probably ready to date.
What are the causes behind output failure? Are we discussing actual dysfunctions of the brain – or does the term merely whitewash certain flaws in character?
This article is written leilui nishmas Sarah Shaindel bas Yitzchask Shraga HaLevi.
Nobody will care about his resume or yours. Nobody will gape at your age difference. And nobody will ask how you could have dated a teacher. EVERYBODY will be too busy admiring your blessed connection and your wonderful happiness.
Short-term emotions are in the moment emotions that can cloud our decision-making process. Short-term emotions can make you replay conversations over and over again until you can’t think straight – even if nothing has changed since you first starting thinking about it.
It would also be prudent to limit the information you share with your parents. This will help you limit the opinions you get. This may be hard if you are used to sharing everything with your mothers and if you are close with them.
We should care about our appearances and do what we want to make us feel good both inside and out. What this might mean to one person might be different to another.
Suddenly, it may start to feel like your like child does not want to speak to you at all. And this is especially difficult at this age since you may feel an even more pressing need to support and protect them as they gain independence.
Share your own experiences with overcoming challenges to show vulnerability and resilience.
Take a deep breath. You are doing so well. Dating someone you like, and feeling positive about your dates is huge. Everything was going nicely until your sister’s blanket statement about timelines and expectations through you off course.
Researchers at Johns Hopkins University discovered that children tend to lose approximately two and half months worth of material over the summer. That is, rather than retaining the material they have mastered during the school year, student who do not flex their academic muscles over the summer revert back to the skills they had in April as opposed to June. Researchers call this phenomenon summer brain drain.
While it may appear to these people that by getting their way they are winning the battle, they are, in fact, losing the war. In other words when people behave this way, they may temporarily get their way, but ultimately, they can lose the relationship.
You need to be fully engaged on your dates. Make eye contact, allow your body language to showcase your interest, and listen carefully to what your date is saying. Show them that you are fully present and happy to be with them.
We don’t often think about children at such a young age having social skills, but did you know that you begin to develop social skills from birth?
We all have to make this choice. We can wallow in self-pity or we can do whatever we can to deal with our challenges.
There is no room for arrogance in dating. There will always be someone prettier, richer, smarter, and more talented than you. There will always be a girl who is more than you. If you do not see these girls, and only see those that are less than you, read this article carefully.
People who are emotional eaters use food to make themselves feel better. In other words, they eat to fill emotional needs, rather than to fill their stomachs.
Please don’t feel that this situation is hopeless. You appear to have the appropriate attitude to life.
A dater must always have an open mind. Objectivity and humility are central to dating and there are certainly times when we can lose ourselves in the exhaustion of it all.
Asperger's Syndrome was first described in the 1940s by an Austrian pediatrician, Hans Asperger, who noticed that he had many patients with deficient social and communicative skills even though they had normal language development and cognitive abilities.
As a grandparent, it is definitely a huge gift to give your children time to get away; however, you also have to know your limits.
Reflect on the moments where he yelled or screamed. You may notice that there are even more instances than you originally noticed.
Sometimes it is hard to name what you are feeling. Suddenly, you feel hot. You feel a bit of a burning session in your chest and on your neck. You can open a window to cool off, but you might not actually be addressing where that physical manifestation is coming from.
Driving in the tri-state area can be very difficult. There is a lot of traffic and impatient drivers. I think for all of us who drive, we feel the constant frustration in dealing with so much craziness on the road.
While this is not simple, it is certainly possible. While, you may see that you are less malleable, you may notice that you are wiser, and more focused on what truly matters in building a happy life.
Feeling like you are different can affect your self-esteem. And self-esteem is essential for forming healthy relationships.
The truth is that we can’t improve the situation without working on ourselves. Every person only has the power to change themselves.
Rather than attempting to modify behaviors right away, Dr. Greene advocates for solving the underlying problems. That means that the challenging behaviors that we might want to change are symptoms of a larger issue that we should focus on rather than those specific challenging behaviors.
The dynamic of talking in shul during prayer or the reading of the Torah, when all is said and done is, with regard to many congregants, a conscious willingness to pervert the fundamental spiritual decorum.
It is inappropriate to date two girls at once. This applies to any number of dates that have passed. It’s wrong and there is no way to change that.
If resilience were a trait, something you had or didn’t have, there would be little we could do to foster it in our children. Part of what is so exciting – and important – about the work of youth development is that children’s resilience is largely determined by how parents and communities raise them.
It seems like Hashem gave you important things in life that money can’t buy. He gave you a special husband and a good family. These brachos are invaluable. Money does not buy happiness.
Sit down for a minute. Just one minute, because this is going to be hard for you to hear. Date him. Date him with intention and an open mind and heart. Focus entirely on him when you date and give him the best version of you filled with enthusiasm and positivity.
Women have a particularly difficult time with shame because there are different (often stricter) societal expectations for women as mothers, fashion figures, and careerists. Therefore, it’s really important to recognize the negative effects of shame on your life and to transform yourself in an effort to control it.
First try to figure out what is making your husband angry. He may have an issue with anger in general, but perhaps you can isolate the trigger points.
It's okay not to attend. You don’t need to give a reason. You can just say that you wish her the greatest happiness but you won’t be able to fly in. That’s it. No explanation necessary.
The most important thing is to keep reminding yourself that you are okay and safe to try to not encode this experience in a traumatic way.
People look different in person, and you know… when they are not two dimensional. People look different after we talk to them, after we connect with them, and certainly after we LIKE them.
As your child grows and learns more about the world, it is natural for him to be hesitant or fearful of new circumstances. In some ways, it is good your child is afraid – it will make him more cautious and careful.
September 18, 2026 
