יום ראשון, ט״ז תשרי תשפ״זSunday, September 27, 2026
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It makes sense that your daughter’s teachers would not have picked up on this in preschool because children are not often forced to speak in the learning process.
I wish you would have asked about a physical attribute, a speech impediment, or a height disparity. I would likely then have cautioned you to keep an open mind and to stretch your inherent beliefs.
Researchers believe that the antibodies that children’s bodies build up in order to fight the strep infection begin to attack other parts of the children’s bodies once the infection is gone.
A marriage filled with checks and balances and the need for an even playing field is always a recipe for conflict and resentment.
The first thing to try to do is stop the power struggles (or judgments) with your daughter. It is important to listen to what your daughter is telling you without correcting her or trying to change her.
Social phobias are characterized not only by nervousness when in social situations or when forced to give a presentation or speech, but also by a powerful desire to avoid most situations that involve interacting with others.
In order to reduce tension and worry, you can try to calm your nervous system by using muscle relaxation, exercise, and meditation.
Dating can be daunting without the added pressure of seeking “kindness” above all else due to a difficult background. Of course you are looking for someone who is kind after your experience at home, as you hope to create a more peaceful life for your future family.
Children with social phobias will withdraw from social situations and refuse to participate in extracurricular activities.
In reality, though, you need to marry against your negative imago... It is very difficult for people with a negative imago to marry against their imago.
This is not a dating problem. This is a life problem. Being a people pleaser is nice, until it makes you feel resentful and not productive.
Don’t rethink it and change the plan. Instead, stick with it. You’ll ultimately be happier and less anxious.
Unfortunately people must envy your position in life and may not realize how much pressure they are putting on you due to their own issues. You must work on setting boundaries in your lives.
You are concerned that even if you are blessed with a “yes,” she may not like you after getting to know you better, and awkwardness with descend on both of your families forever and ever.
Stay balanced. As painful as it is to watch your child feel isolated, you must maintain a calm countenance.
Try to always make your husband feel that he is the most important person in your life. A strong marriage builds healthy, confident children.
Unless you neglected to mention it in your question, I will assume his is not a mind-reader, a clairvoyant, or have telepathic powers. He cannot see your thoughts.
We can be thrown off by the content of the feedback itself. If the feedback is off, impractical or false, we can feel frustrated and wronged.
Perhaps you feel people only want things from you in a relationship. However, it is healthy to also take things from others. Do you give people a chance to give to you?
First dates are often fraught with nerves and there are those that are simply unable to put their best foot forward. This small window allows daters to barely scratch the surface of personality, temperament and shared interests.
In order for Leah to set people more at ease, she has to be more comfortable herself.
I started at eighteen and that has not made a difference in my life. I went on shidduch dates, single events, traveled and still have not found my soul mate. There is only so much in one's control.
Meeting the right person and a successful marriage will definitely infuse your life with happiness. Dating and marriage, however, are not the “cure-all” for all sadness.
Many people learn how to make friends without any direct instruction; however, there are some children who do not automatically pick up on social cues and may need to be specifically taught.
Sometimes the in-law relationship can reflect the relationship between the spouse and his own parents.
Carefully and respectfully raise this issue again. Explain to him that while your salary might be higher than his, your earnings would be used for your collective family.
Many times, people might have the ability to make friends, but fail to maintain them because they lack the skills to translate the subtleties of language.
Although you are trying to lighten the atmosphere, it sounds like the humor in these situations is sometimes damaging to your relationship with your children.
I would be remiss if I didn’t take a moment to mention that while I could never condone hurting someone’s feelings, the truth still matters.
Right now, physicians do not agree when exactly a child should be diagnosed with PDD-NOS, autism, or Aspergers syndrome. Because of this, it is possible for the same child to receive different diagnoses from different doctors even as he exhibits exactly the same symptoms.
I was a young wife, with two young children and my husband became remarkably successful financially... While I tried to be a loving mother and wife, I often felt very alone in raising our children.
Taking the time to reach out to those who know a potential date will offer insight into personality and character traits before you even meet them.
Don’t hesitate to look for help outside of your family – there are great resources out there – books, support groups, and other educational courses.
I never thought that my going out to lunch alone with our daughter would trigger him. He told me that he felt left out. It reminded him of his childhood when he felt excluded by his parents and his friends.
You have been blessed. You met someone quickly and forged a strong connection with ease. There are however, some guidelines that you can remember to reassure yourself that you are making a healthy decision. It’s all about the C’s.
There’s nothing wrong with trying your best. In fact, giving it your best shot is what you should attempt to do every day...
I am sure you have a lot to offer someone and it would be good to start focusing on your positive attributes in order to help pull yourself out of this depression.
Controlling behavior is always a red flag. A healthy relationship includes compromise and at the very least a willingness to listen.
his ability to compromise is an indispensable part of a successful relationship. Without compromise, marriages could never work.
I strongly believe in something I call “cozy time.” This is the time when you put your children to sleep. It would be most advantageous for each child to get five to ten minutes of alone time with both of you every night.
You want to make a life with this wonderful guy, but you worry that when he sees where and how you have grown up, he will think less of you, less of your family. You feel ashamed.
As children enter elementary school, and reading becomes an integral part of the curriculum, children with learning disorders begin to struggle academically.
It appears that you have to try to navigate this situation in a loving manner and try to help your husband understand that you get headaches from a hot house.
You need to recognize that while you like each other and see promise in a future together, something in one or both of you is preventing an emotional connection from developing to the point that you can commit to one another.
When still in school, it’s easier to make friends because you are forced into social situations. As an adult, making friends can be harder – especially because your life is busy.
When a person gives you unsolicited advice, you can say, I appreciate your suggestion, but what I really need is a listening ear and support through my situation.
We can perhaps discuss the importance of honesty. You did not give your sisters the chance to accept your choice with dignity before you began dating.
Do sensory processing disorders affect academics? The answer, unfortunately, is a resounding yes.
OCD responds extremely well to cognitive-behavioral therapy. Research has demonstrated that cognitive-behavioral therapy is indeed most effective in treating OCD.
It is frustrating to feel like an afterthought. While I would like to give your date the benefit of the doubt and assume he most certainly wanted to be there, how he presented himself made you feel otherwise.
Widen your options. Don’t go with a “whether or not” decision. Instead think “and” instead of “or.”
Psychologically, you can try to approach them in a calm manner to discuss what happened, but I am not sure that this will be helpful and it may just escalate the issue.
I have said this before and I will say it again; if someone cannot commit to you after a year, they are unlikely to commit to you ever.
I question whether you must call her often and bear the pain of her hurtful remarks.
What’s the connection between women and shame? Why does it seem like women have so much more guilt than men?
While there are definitely older singles who are doctors, they are not standing en masse waiting for accomplished women outside the Emergency Room.
By Baruch Lytle
On the question whether singles felt that the Orthodox system of dating was going well, Nishma found that most singles had an unfavorable view.
Ask your daughter what the cause of her anxiety is – social, academic, or separation from you.
Try to remove your feelings from the situation and become neutral. Don't feel that the child is purposely trying to upset you as this will just exacerbate the situation.
We can always argue that we only need that 'one' right person, but we still need to be offered the opportunities to meet that special guy.
Try to place yourself in her shoes and say, I know you are trying to listen and sometimes that is difficult. Let’s try that again.
Rabbi Wallerstein answered me, We cannot live without time. When your time is up, Hashem takes your neshama. There is no choice.
You friend is not expecting you to pull a perfect single guy out of a magic hat. She does however, want your care, concern, and friendship.
Even small, day-to-day acts of self-control such as maintaining good posture can reinforce longer-term self-control in activities that have nothing to do with your posture.
It is always possible to overcome a tough situation through out of the box thinking, and not give in to the only options you think you have to pick from.
How you present yourself is key. Both your character and your appearance should be refined to reflect who you are accurately and to your highest standard.
When still in school, it’s easier to make friends because you are forced into social situations. As an adult, making friends can be harder – especially because your life is busy.
My husband expects me to be the tzaddaikes and always give into my mother-in-law for kibud em. He says that Hashem gave him a difficult mother, but he chose me to be his wife.
Please don’t think I am minimizing what you feel, but you must immediately expand your circle, your horizons, and your world.
For those who are introverted, being with people often feels like it is sapping their energy – even if they themselves have great social skills.
I believe that in therapy if both husband and wife work on their individual issues, and then show positive loving feelings to one another, the marriage can improve dramatically.
I stared over at Binyamin. Not that long ago I had cared for him, Shaindy, not deeply or passionately, but enough to look forward to his coming home, enough to worry about his health and well-being. Had he ever cared about me?
Please Dr. Respler give me ideas on how to parent my grown children properly.
Forty-five minutes later, he called. “You’re a witch! What are you doing to me?” “What happened now?” I held the phone three inches from my poor ear. “As if you don’t know.” I took a bite of toast. “Tell me.”
This is of course your right and there is certainly the argument that sometimes we all need to recharge, to take a break, and to step back when we feel beaten down or overwhelmed.
Networking is also a very good medium. We let the word out when we were initially looking to adopt; we told many people. She should let the word out to people she knows outside of her state.
Your willingness to learn and grow is already an asset in the shidduch process. There are, however, some ideas that might help you during this time.
I tried to communicate with my eyes – stop, no more tricks! – but he shuffled over to Binyamin’s side and whispered in his ear.
People with self-esteem have a strong sense of their own worth, which leads them to stand up for themselves when others attempt to put them down.
September 25, 2026 
